it's been a slow ramp down, but i'm willing to finally (albeit
cautiously) declare myself a purely social smoker. the last three weeks
of april were pretty much cold turkey, we're talking one or two
opportunistic puffs over three weeks, and it's really put me over that
final hump. i've been slowly disassociating the habit from the things i
had it attached to: wake up, after meal, etc. at this point, those
connections are just not there anymore. i even spent my smoke money on
mushroom soup, which sounds weird but the expenses related to fixing my
pc had me broke all month and i found myself down to spaghetti and
canned beans the last week, which is something i don't want to repeat.
hence, a large stack of mushroom soup (which i use as pasta sauce).
so, i have no nicotine budgeted for may. if i get to june 1st without breaking, i'll be done with the "cautiously" part.
it
was weird walking around this morning, though, 'cause i found myself
hypersensitive to other people smoking. smokers will mostly agree that
they can't really smell the smoke coming from the guy at the bus stop. i
can't say it ever bothered me before i started smoking, either. but,
when you've stopped smoking for a while, you start to notice it, and it
starts to bug you because you're trying to avoid it. it's especially
been the smell, for me; once it gets in your clothes, you start carrying
it around with you and it's a constant reminder. i mean, i'm sure i'll
get used to it over time. but that was a surreal experience that i took
as indicative of something positive...