this is the original version slowed down to half speed, which i actually briefly considered releasing as the final version as i felt it was aesthetically appropriate.
recorded in jan, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/useless-valium
Sunday, November 10, 2013
not that there’s anything wrong with that (original album mix)
this is that faux-homophobe song again, and i'm going to call myself out for it this time on two levels. i'm kind of uncomfortable uploading it not once but twice, but i promised myself i'd upload everything, so here it is.
i've been uncomfortable with this since i wrote it, basically. i really hesitated for a while in releasing this. it was one of the first things i recorded with my new 4-track (the timestamp is jan 17, 1998), but it didn't make it to the first demo. it only made it to the second demo in feb, 1999. with a lot of caution. i ended up releasing it because i liked the fact that it sounded like ministry.
in my defense, i should point out that these kinds of songs exist in the punk rock tradition going back to the glam days. ministry wrote a number of songs like this, ridiculing exaggerated masculinity. this is what i was going for the second time around. further, in the sense that the song is about me being picked on, i feel i sort of retain the right to express myself about it.
where it falls into trouble is it's level of ambiguity. it's meant to be satire, but how is anybody supposed to know that? the answer is the seinfeld line - and this was consciously inserted for that very reason. yet, the signal that sends isn't "this song is sarcastic" so much as it is "homophobes aren't the brightest people". that's really what the song is about - i was getting picked on by people i didn't think were very smart, and i was reacting by ridiculing their intelligence through merely repeating what they were saying. this is meant to shock, and that's where the track gets it's "edge".
we would refer to such a thing nowadays as "hipster homophobia", and this is where i'm calling myself out, here. my argument is essentially "it's ok to be hateful if you're being ironic". but, that's not an argument i would currently make - it's an argument that i'd argue rather strenuously against.
again: i feel i had the right to express myself here, and the song is anti-oppressive in it's intent. yet, i didn't articulate that well, and sort of fell into a trap. i can convincingly argue that i was a teenager and didn't really know any better, but that argument necessitates that i correct myself.
the original version and write-up are over here:
jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/not-that-theres-anything-wrong-with-that
recorded in jan, 1998.
http://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/06-not-that-theres-anything-wrong-with-that
i've been uncomfortable with this since i wrote it, basically. i really hesitated for a while in releasing this. it was one of the first things i recorded with my new 4-track (the timestamp is jan 17, 1998), but it didn't make it to the first demo. it only made it to the second demo in feb, 1999. with a lot of caution. i ended up releasing it because i liked the fact that it sounded like ministry.
in my defense, i should point out that these kinds of songs exist in the punk rock tradition going back to the glam days. ministry wrote a number of songs like this, ridiculing exaggerated masculinity. this is what i was going for the second time around. further, in the sense that the song is about me being picked on, i feel i sort of retain the right to express myself about it.
where it falls into trouble is it's level of ambiguity. it's meant to be satire, but how is anybody supposed to know that? the answer is the seinfeld line - and this was consciously inserted for that very reason. yet, the signal that sends isn't "this song is sarcastic" so much as it is "homophobes aren't the brightest people". that's really what the song is about - i was getting picked on by people i didn't think were very smart, and i was reacting by ridiculing their intelligence through merely repeating what they were saying. this is meant to shock, and that's where the track gets it's "edge".
we would refer to such a thing nowadays as "hipster homophobia", and this is where i'm calling myself out, here. my argument is essentially "it's ok to be hateful if you're being ironic". but, that's not an argument i would currently make - it's an argument that i'd argue rather strenuously against.
again: i feel i had the right to express myself here, and the song is anti-oppressive in it's intent. yet, i didn't articulate that well, and sort of fell into a trap. i can convincingly argue that i was a teenager and didn't really know any better, but that argument necessitates that i correct myself.
the original version and write-up are over here:
jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/not-that-theres-anything-wrong-with-that
recorded in jan, 1998.
http://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/06-not-that-theres-anything-wrong-with-that
cat’s apocalypse (original discarded outtake)
this is a remix of the track 'war' (http://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/11-war) that i had no intention of releasing. i was trying to irritate a cat lover (i can't recall who). epic troll, really.
i'd trigger it for cat owners, but it's really too absurd and disingenuous to be offensive.
recorded in jan, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/cats-apocalypse-1998-archive-2
i'd trigger it for cat owners, but it's really too absurd and disingenuous to be offensive.
recorded in jan, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/cats-apocalypse-1998-archive-2
slaves (original discarded outtake)
this was inspired by an snl skit. pure silliness.
recorded in jan, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/slaves
recorded in jan, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/slaves
permission (original discarded outtake)
this is the remake of permission, which is really funky and neat, but i ended up rejecting it because the guitar solo directly lifts the ending melody from "the perfect drug". i don't really remember the logic behind how it got there in the first place (did i realize after or was it purposefully meant as a 'sample'?), but i do specifically recall saying "i can't use this". i think maybe i also thought the lyrics were sort of dumb, after all.
of course, a lot of the songs on those cassette demos recycle ideas from nine inch nails, and i've cringed a few times in uploading these songs, but in the context of the tracks mostly being experiments in learning how to record music it's less of a problem for me, in hindsight, then it could be. those were things that affected me, at that age. they're there for a reason. the cassette demos were never meant to be brilliant works of original art, or even for sale at all (and they never have been). it was just something i did as a sort of a release.
these cd demos, though, were meant to be more professional. there are a few awkward samples interspersed throughout them in ways that were meaningful to me and seem questionable now looking back, but part of the reason i redid these songs in the first place was to reclaim them from myself as entirely original pieces.
my sister's backing vocals have been replaced with myself, digitally altered. there's also a lot of electronic soundscaping: this is a substantially different piece of music than the cassette demo, which is here:
http://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/permission
actually, i think i'm remembering that i put the 'sample' in on purpose because the vocals were so derivative, then kibboshed the whole thing.
yeah. i was playing the melody as i was testing levels, and i decided that it actually sounded really good - but that I couldn't use it, or i would be sealing the track as an outtake. i then decided that it should be an outtake anyways and went with it.
recorded in january, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/permission-2
of course, a lot of the songs on those cassette demos recycle ideas from nine inch nails, and i've cringed a few times in uploading these songs, but in the context of the tracks mostly being experiments in learning how to record music it's less of a problem for me, in hindsight, then it could be. those were things that affected me, at that age. they're there for a reason. the cassette demos were never meant to be brilliant works of original art, or even for sale at all (and they never have been). it was just something i did as a sort of a release.
these cd demos, though, were meant to be more professional. there are a few awkward samples interspersed throughout them in ways that were meaningful to me and seem questionable now looking back, but part of the reason i redid these songs in the first place was to reclaim them from myself as entirely original pieces.
my sister's backing vocals have been replaced with myself, digitally altered. there's also a lot of electronic soundscaping: this is a substantially different piece of music than the cassette demo, which is here:
http://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/permission
actually, i think i'm remembering that i put the 'sample' in on purpose because the vocals were so derivative, then kibboshed the whole thing.
yeah. i was playing the melody as i was testing levels, and i decided that it actually sounded really good - but that I couldn't use it, or i would be sealing the track as an outtake. i then decided that it should be an outtake anyways and went with it.
recorded in january, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/permission-2
nails (original album mix)
homer, indeed. i think that might be the ry30 with the drums, recording directly into the back of the pc.
created in the fall of 1997.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/nails
created in the fall of 1997.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/nails
war (original album mix)
the beginning is from a disney film or something, i can't recall which one. it's all wiped away by a wash of war drums and civ2 samples. it's more misanthropic than anti-war, really.
created in the fall of 1997.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/war
created in the fall of 1997.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/war
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