i think my perspective is slightly different than the people that i'm going with. i've been thinking about this for a few days and am going to try and articulate what *i'm* thinking and why *i'm* going.
i was reading up a little this morning on the idea of a temporary autonomous zone, which is a concept that developed out of the post-left critique of traditional anarchist thinking. it seems to be the idea that the occupy movement was conceptualized around. whilst living within everything that's around us, and the apparent hopelessness of fighting against a system that protects itself with drone strikes and riot police, is there a way to carve out a small space that allows for the experience of real freedom?
southern ontario is a bubble that's developing in the collapse of industrial civilization. from the perspective of a factory worker with a family to feed, this is a catastrophe. from the perspective of an artist that rejects the concept of wage labour, it's an opportunity to grasp upon. i want to walk in to this vacuum, this growing autonomous region, and help build an entirely different way to exist.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
so, i'm in the process of blowing my life up and starting over somewhere else.
i'm moving to somewhere in southern ontario super soon. august 1st, maybe. i'm hitching out of town on monday with some friends to check out places in windsor, but i haven't entirely committed to moving precisely there yet. to start off with, i've never even been there before. seems a little impulsive to make that choice without visiting first, and i'm not a really impulsive person.
other possible destinations are niagara and waterloo.
why? the simple reason is that the cost of living in these places is drastically lower. i don't particularly want to leave ottawa for a small town, my preference would be for a larger city, but it's clear at this point that i cannot live the lifestyle i want to live in a city that is this expensive.
two of these places have other advantages. windsor is very close to the music scene in detroit; waterloo has a university i've always wanted to hang out at (and train access into toronto). niagara appears to be the cheapest of the three.
i'm moving to somewhere in southern ontario super soon. august 1st, maybe. i'm hitching out of town on monday with some friends to check out places in windsor, but i haven't entirely committed to moving precisely there yet. to start off with, i've never even been there before. seems a little impulsive to make that choice without visiting first, and i'm not a really impulsive person.
other possible destinations are niagara and waterloo.
why? the simple reason is that the cost of living in these places is drastically lower. i don't particularly want to leave ottawa for a small town, my preference would be for a larger city, but it's clear at this point that i cannot live the lifestyle i want to live in a city that is this expensive.
two of these places have other advantages. windsor is very close to the music scene in detroit; waterloo has a university i've always wanted to hang out at (and train access into toronto). niagara appears to be the cheapest of the three.
staying in for the night, but why am i getting tracers?
ESA
are you going to asylum tonihgtÉ
É
Jessica Amber Murray
that accent acute is a little unnecessary.
i think i need a jessica night.
ESA
my keyboard switched to French. its supposed to be a question mark. yeah, I don't want to either, but I promised dylan.
Jessica Amber Murray
i'm actually a little weirded out about not remembering how we got home last night. did we walk? cab?
ESA
half walked, and then cabbed
wow, I didnèt know you werrethat drunk
Jessica Amber Murray
i'm a little concerned i wasn't drunk. did i pay at all?
ESA
no I think playa payed
Jessica Amber Murray
my knees are really weirdly wobbly today. i've been randomly dizzy. i'm getting mushroom trip like reality swirls.
i left my drink out a few times.
i should be more careful with that.
ESA
hangover!
i feel a little weird too
Jessica Amber Murray
it's not normal hangover stuff, though. my knees don't normally get like this, that's for sure.
ESA
sshitttt
fuck i don't want to go to the asylum...
but i need to say bye to dylan.
Jessica Amber Murray
then don't go. he can't be leaving tonight. invite him over for coffee tomorrow.
ESA
yeah but still hell be mad if i don't go.
are you going to asylum tonihgtÉ
É
Jessica Amber Murray
that accent acute is a little unnecessary.
i think i need a jessica night.
ESA
my keyboard switched to French. its supposed to be a question mark. yeah, I don't want to either, but I promised dylan.
Jessica Amber Murray
i'm actually a little weirded out about not remembering how we got home last night. did we walk? cab?
ESA
half walked, and then cabbed
wow, I didnèt know you werrethat drunk
Jessica Amber Murray
i'm a little concerned i wasn't drunk. did i pay at all?
ESA
no I think playa payed
Jessica Amber Murray
my knees are really weirdly wobbly today. i've been randomly dizzy. i'm getting mushroom trip like reality swirls.
i left my drink out a few times.
i should be more careful with that.
ESA
hangover!
i feel a little weird too
Jessica Amber Murray
it's not normal hangover stuff, though. my knees don't normally get like this, that's for sure.
ESA
sshitttt
fuck i don't want to go to the asylum...
but i need to say bye to dylan.
Jessica Amber Murray
then don't go. he can't be leaving tonight. invite him over for coffee tomorrow.
ESA
yeah but still hell be mad if i don't go.
what happened
ESA
JESSS
MY HEAD IS MELTING
OW.
Jessica Amber Murray
hungover? i find caffeinated pop works the best, despite it being exactly the opposite of what science claims in the matter.
just tell me if you're coming or not so i can plan.
ESA
coming where?
Jessica Amber Murray
greely.
ESA
I think i'm too gross
Jessica Amber Murray
s'all good, no pressure.
ESA
can we do it on a not-so-hungover day?
Jessica Amber Murray
sure. they're always home, they need very little notice.
ESA
ugh the subletter guy bailed.
Jessica Amber Murray
fuck. well, you've got like 800 other people.
ESA
yeah but he was kewl
I forgot about my uke lesson
slept in until like 230
Jessica Amber Murray
you forgot your doctor's appointment too, i guess. maybe you can use that as an argument.
ESA
OH SHIT. yeah I forgot that. fuck
fuck. going to mac's milk is the hardest thing in the world right now.
Jessica Amber Murray
just yell out the window. ooh! you should set up one of those tin can telephones with the store and put a pulley system on it.
ESA
yeah
fuckit. I look like shit.
and whenever I leave I see so fucking many people I know
its so annoying
Jessica Amber Murray
are you coercing me to buy you pop and bring it up?
ESA
no.
hahahha no
I can do that myself.
BTW
ALMOST THREESOME
LAST NIGHT
They keep failing through though. I'm very mad about that.
Jessica Amber Murray
so, it was, like, sequential sex, then? i can't even handle sex with one person, a threesome would probably make me vomit out of self-conscious fear.
ESA
hahaha
buaahahahahaha
well. no. I tried very harrd to make it happen
and lenin was down, but then he was not down.
Jessica Amber Murray
so, no sex at all? geez, i was excited for a second.
ESA
what do you mean no sex?
OF COURSE THERE WAS SEX
haha
hahahabuahaha
a true lady does not kiss and tell
Except I think I already did.
Jessica Amber Murray
that other guy you brought home seemed like the type, but i'm not sure i could really imagine lenin having sex.
ESA
haha. seemed like the type ?
the sex type?
Its so funny, he was like in love with me when I was 19
he was so excited and disbelievgin the whole time.
Jessica Amber Murray
yeah, seemed kinda playery.
ESA
I like worship sex. its kinda my favorite.
yeah I dunno if he's player now. He didn't used to be. he was such a dweeb.
Jessica Amber Murray
i just can't do it. it's almost impossible to explain. like, when i have sex dreams, i have a vagina and it involves insertion. it's real in the dream state. i just don't know how the fuck to use a penis. so when i was having sex when i was younger i'd basically just sit there and watch, i'd totally disassociate. anyways, i'm glad you got laid. high five.
ESA
wooohhh
you should get a strap on vagina
I guess its not the same.
lololol
Jessica Amber Murray
not at all. it makes dating and one night stands and everything else such a dead end, though, that i don't bother. about the only way i know how to pleasure somebody is with my fingers and mouth.
ESA
well then.
most people don't know what they're doing with their dinkie anyways
so its basically useless.
and yeah I also made up a new word
Jessica Amber Murray
what's the new word?
ESA
dinkie
likes like winky. except not.
Jessica Amber Murray
dinkie is definitely not a new word, it's what i called it when i was a kid.
ESA
that's winkie!
are you sure? oh well whateva
Jessica Amber Murray
absolutely sure. because my mom thought dinkie was cute and dink was crude, so that was the permitted official terminology.
ESA
LOL
JESSS
MY HEAD IS MELTING
OW.
Jessica Amber Murray
hungover? i find caffeinated pop works the best, despite it being exactly the opposite of what science claims in the matter.
just tell me if you're coming or not so i can plan.
ESA
coming where?
Jessica Amber Murray
greely.
ESA
I think i'm too gross
Jessica Amber Murray
s'all good, no pressure.
ESA
can we do it on a not-so-hungover day?
Jessica Amber Murray
sure. they're always home, they need very little notice.
ESA
ugh the subletter guy bailed.
Jessica Amber Murray
fuck. well, you've got like 800 other people.
ESA
yeah but he was kewl
I forgot about my uke lesson
slept in until like 230
Jessica Amber Murray
you forgot your doctor's appointment too, i guess. maybe you can use that as an argument.
ESA
OH SHIT. yeah I forgot that. fuck
fuck. going to mac's milk is the hardest thing in the world right now.
Jessica Amber Murray
just yell out the window. ooh! you should set up one of those tin can telephones with the store and put a pulley system on it.
ESA
yeah
fuckit. I look like shit.
and whenever I leave I see so fucking many people I know
its so annoying
Jessica Amber Murray
are you coercing me to buy you pop and bring it up?
ESA
no.
hahahha no
I can do that myself.
BTW
ALMOST THREESOME
LAST NIGHT
They keep failing through though. I'm very mad about that.
Jessica Amber Murray
so, it was, like, sequential sex, then? i can't even handle sex with one person, a threesome would probably make me vomit out of self-conscious fear.
ESA
hahaha
buaahahahahaha
well. no. I tried very harrd to make it happen
and lenin was down, but then he was not down.
Jessica Amber Murray
so, no sex at all? geez, i was excited for a second.
ESA
what do you mean no sex?
OF COURSE THERE WAS SEX
haha
hahahabuahaha
a true lady does not kiss and tell
Except I think I already did.
Jessica Amber Murray
that other guy you brought home seemed like the type, but i'm not sure i could really imagine lenin having sex.
ESA
haha. seemed like the type ?
the sex type?
Its so funny, he was like in love with me when I was 19
he was so excited and disbelievgin the whole time.
Jessica Amber Murray
yeah, seemed kinda playery.
ESA
I like worship sex. its kinda my favorite.
yeah I dunno if he's player now. He didn't used to be. he was such a dweeb.
Jessica Amber Murray
i just can't do it. it's almost impossible to explain. like, when i have sex dreams, i have a vagina and it involves insertion. it's real in the dream state. i just don't know how the fuck to use a penis. so when i was having sex when i was younger i'd basically just sit there and watch, i'd totally disassociate. anyways, i'm glad you got laid. high five.
ESA
wooohhh
you should get a strap on vagina
I guess its not the same.
lololol
Jessica Amber Murray
not at all. it makes dating and one night stands and everything else such a dead end, though, that i don't bother. about the only way i know how to pleasure somebody is with my fingers and mouth.
ESA
well then.
most people don't know what they're doing with their dinkie anyways
so its basically useless.
and yeah I also made up a new word
Jessica Amber Murray
what's the new word?
ESA
dinkie
likes like winky. except not.
Jessica Amber Murray
dinkie is definitely not a new word, it's what i called it when i was a kid.
ESA
that's winkie!
are you sure? oh well whateva
Jessica Amber Murray
absolutely sure. because my mom thought dinkie was cute and dink was crude, so that was the permitted official terminology.
ESA
LOL
consequences
Jessica Amber Murray
i was legit drunk last night. i vaguely remember hanging out in the park, and i remember realizing i was drunk and going home, but i don't remember how we got from the hostel back to hintonburg. as expected, breakfast this morning got cancelled. i rescheduled for supper, which means going to their place. we can likely get a ride from south keys to findley creek, but it's bussing to there. no pressure. but let me know if you do or do not want to go. (time is not really set, whenever, i'll call them back)
(drunk because no caffeine.)
i remember some drunk young lady falling all over me outside the women's washroom, and her eventually saying "have a good night, lovely" and me thinking lovely was a weird thing to call somebody. and you and etan stealing my drink. and other scattered things. but that's why i need rockstar.
ESA
lol. wtf. I was sooo wasted to.
i was legit drunk last night. i vaguely remember hanging out in the park, and i remember realizing i was drunk and going home, but i don't remember how we got from the hostel back to hintonburg. as expected, breakfast this morning got cancelled. i rescheduled for supper, which means going to their place. we can likely get a ride from south keys to findley creek, but it's bussing to there. no pressure. but let me know if you do or do not want to go. (time is not really set, whenever, i'll call them back)
(drunk because no caffeine.)
i remember some drunk young lady falling all over me outside the women's washroom, and her eventually saying "have a good night, lovely" and me thinking lovely was a weird thing to call somebody. and you and etan stealing my drink. and other scattered things. but that's why i need rockstar.
ESA
lol. wtf. I was sooo wasted to.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)