page is wiped clean, if you care to look. i'm currently combining all of the loose ends into a single file, and then i'll be rebuilding this in parallel with the other sources. so, i'll post the new blog shortly.
i'm realizing that the alter-reality will need to catch-up before i can finish the aleph disc. all of them, actually. oops. well...
let me get there, first. but, i'm thinking i'm going to have to wait until 2019 before it finalizes. yeah. well, it's kind of appropriate, too. but i can at least construct everything else, then just make space for the continuing blog.
yeah.
Friday, June 10, 2016
i'm not bleeding yet. but my wrists have been a problem for weeks. there's a huge red splotch that looks like it's going to blow. what do i do? go to a hospital? wait it out?
i'm trying to eat more and drink more water - and i actually think i'm succeeding. see..
i boosted my hormones a few months ago, and i think that what's happening is that they're not getting fuel to carry out their instruction set. something that happens when you take estrogen is that your body gets instructions (in the form of chemical signals) to redistribute fat differently. now, energy can neither be created nor destroyed but only converted from one source to another (we can be engineers in context - it's true enough). so, if you get instructions to increase hip width and and build breast size but you're not consuming more excess energy for storage then your body is going to have to go towards other stores of fat - like your arms - to complete the instructions being given out by the hormones. the solution is that if you're very thin and you want to boost your hormones then you should probably eat more, too.
like i say: i do think that increasing my calorie intake has started to make a difference. all the fat is migrating to the girl spots, which is a start. i'm not storing weight in my stomach (in fact, my stomach looks smaller because my hips are coming out). but i'm not noticing my fat stores in my arms or my neck come back yet, which was why i started eating more. it's only been about two weeks, though, too.
as i was typing this, the red mark disappeared. i think that's what i was expecting would happen. it was probably just irritation from laying it down on the table, although it remains reflective of not getting enough calories. listen: i actually eat well. i just put my body into shock.
had it blown, though, i'd definitely be seeking naturalistic explanations.
i'm trying to eat more and drink more water - and i actually think i'm succeeding. see..
i boosted my hormones a few months ago, and i think that what's happening is that they're not getting fuel to carry out their instruction set. something that happens when you take estrogen is that your body gets instructions (in the form of chemical signals) to redistribute fat differently. now, energy can neither be created nor destroyed but only converted from one source to another (we can be engineers in context - it's true enough). so, if you get instructions to increase hip width and and build breast size but you're not consuming more excess energy for storage then your body is going to have to go towards other stores of fat - like your arms - to complete the instructions being given out by the hormones. the solution is that if you're very thin and you want to boost your hormones then you should probably eat more, too.
like i say: i do think that increasing my calorie intake has started to make a difference. all the fat is migrating to the girl spots, which is a start. i'm not storing weight in my stomach (in fact, my stomach looks smaller because my hips are coming out). but i'm not noticing my fat stores in my arms or my neck come back yet, which was why i started eating more. it's only been about two weeks, though, too.
as i was typing this, the red mark disappeared. i think that's what i was expecting would happen. it was probably just irritation from laying it down on the table, although it remains reflective of not getting enough calories. listen: i actually eat well. i just put my body into shock.
had it blown, though, i'd definitely be seeking naturalistic explanations.
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