Monday, May 11, 2020

i'm actually glad i saved this, as it really is it's own thing.

it's no longer an official release, though, so it's going to mostly get passed over. well, i guess i'll have to update the notes for inrijected.

the only drug i take habitually or want to take habitually is caffeine.
so, i seem to have finally gotten some sleep, at least. that was more than i usually get at one time, including an unheard of unbroken six hours.

i don't understand what's going on with me, right now....

i wanted to be productive this weekend, but the fucking pig upstairs was smoking all weekend, which just made me unfocused and unproductive. i was neither able to work, nor to sleep - i just found myself staring at the wall.

the migraine never triggered fully, but it's still there, ready to kick back in.

and, i still don't know if i actually got the virus or i'm just suffering through the second-hand smoke.

what next, then? i wanted to get done most of the rebuild over the weekend, and then do some court stuff early this week. i only got through six days of january, 2014.

i'm going to push through for another day or two, but i may have to stop mid-week.

i moved here to avoid this. it's very frustrating and very depressing :(.

i'm in the category of people that would find constant inebriation to be a cause of depression, rather than a solution to it, and i don't have any ambiguity or confusion around the point - i am fully cognizant of the fact that i don't like it, and don't want to be around it on a habitual basis. i don't need to experiment. i know...