Monday, October 14, 2013
demo #9: terrorists
i really don't want to upload this, but i want to be comprehensive in getting everything up, and i actually really like the musical aspect of parts of this (especially the end section, which is one of the creepiest things i've ever managed to successfully get out).
lyrically, this is the most embarrassing of these tracks, and not because i was being a goof on purpose (which is true for most of this stuff), but because i was trying to be insightful for a change and failed badly. i have no idea why i mixed the vocals so loudly but it's irreversible....
well, again, i was 15. systemic analyses were a little beyond me, and further beyond the people surrounding me.
i guess i could at least say that the version of things i was exposed to didn't make sense to me. hence the first-person satire, in misguided biting punk rock prose.
i should also point out that 'terrorist' in 1996 had a different meaning that younger people may not be able to connect with. terrorists were people that blew up abortion clinics in the deep south, gay night clubs in germany, federal buildings in oklahoma, churches in northern ireland and synagogues in montreal. while terrorists always identified as religious extremists, the religion they connected to was not certain and, at least in the mind of this individual, the assumption was that they were usually christians and probably white supremacists. i didn't get properly programmed after 9/11 because i avoided media; to this day, i still assign white supremacist christian groups as the primary suspect in any kind of attack , and tend to hold to it until evidence surfaces. when you keep that in mind, the song makes a little more sense.
recorded in october, 1996. remastered on oct 14, 2013.
lyrically, this is the most embarrassing of these tracks, and not because i was being a goof on purpose (which is true for most of this stuff), but because i was trying to be insightful for a change and failed badly. i have no idea why i mixed the vocals so loudly but it's irreversible....
well, again, i was 15. systemic analyses were a little beyond me, and further beyond the people surrounding me.
i guess i could at least say that the version of things i was exposed to didn't make sense to me. hence the first-person satire, in misguided biting punk rock prose.
i should also point out that 'terrorist' in 1996 had a different meaning that younger people may not be able to connect with. terrorists were people that blew up abortion clinics in the deep south, gay night clubs in germany, federal buildings in oklahoma, churches in northern ireland and synagogues in montreal. while terrorists always identified as religious extremists, the religion they connected to was not certain and, at least in the mind of this individual, the assumption was that they were usually christians and probably white supremacists. i didn't get properly programmed after 9/11 because i avoided media; to this day, i still assign white supremacist christian groups as the primary suspect in any kind of attack , and tend to hold to it until evidence surfaces. when you keep that in mind, the song makes a little more sense.
recorded in october, 1996. remastered on oct 14, 2013.
aloha
hey.
i'm not entirely piecing together those apparent wedding (?) pictures, but i do hope you're happy. and safe.
life here is sort of quietly hectic. like, i don't have a worry in the world. i love it. but i've got so much stuff to do.
i've got my website up here:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/
it's a primary focus. i hope to finally have the shell done in the next few hours. it's taken far too long to sort through. then, music...
...and reading.
i guess we always had different perceptions on the value of existence. you were all about the body, and physicality; i was all about the mind, knowledge, abstraction. maybe it's funny that i'm the empiricist and you're the spiritual one?
...but i'm happy here. i've found something.
erin is still in ottawa, if you're curious. i wanted to have my own place, i was clear about that from the very start. i didn't really trust her, and i didn't really like the other people that were planning on coming down. she ended up unable to find somewhere to stay in windsor, so she stayed there. honestly, i'm sort of happy about that. our friendship was based on being mutually antagonistic. we're both always right. etc. so we just fought, and maybe we both enjoyed it on some level. yet, she's a lot more competitive than i am and it brings out this really mean streak. near the end, i got kind of *afraid* of her and wasn't really sure how to cut off communication.
that seems to be over with, now, and i'm very relieved about it.
if you're ever in the 'hood, you should drop me a line.
but this email is to say congratulations. i think.
jess
i'm not entirely piecing together those apparent wedding (?) pictures, but i do hope you're happy. and safe.
life here is sort of quietly hectic. like, i don't have a worry in the world. i love it. but i've got so much stuff to do.
i've got my website up here:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/
it's a primary focus. i hope to finally have the shell done in the next few hours. it's taken far too long to sort through. then, music...
...and reading.
i guess we always had different perceptions on the value of existence. you were all about the body, and physicality; i was all about the mind, knowledge, abstraction. maybe it's funny that i'm the empiricist and you're the spiritual one?
...but i'm happy here. i've found something.
erin is still in ottawa, if you're curious. i wanted to have my own place, i was clear about that from the very start. i didn't really trust her, and i didn't really like the other people that were planning on coming down. she ended up unable to find somewhere to stay in windsor, so she stayed there. honestly, i'm sort of happy about that. our friendship was based on being mutually antagonistic. we're both always right. etc. so we just fought, and maybe we both enjoyed it on some level. yet, she's a lot more competitive than i am and it brings out this really mean streak. near the end, i got kind of *afraid* of her and wasn't really sure how to cut off communication.
that seems to be over with, now, and i'm very relieved about it.
if you're ever in the 'hood, you should drop me a line.
but this email is to say congratulations. i think.
jess
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