i can't make sense of this. i'm starting to understand the tonal differences a little better, but it really makes no less sense to me as to how i ended up where i am.

the guitars null flat. there's some bleed, but it's from the bass part, as it was transferred from tape. tapes bleed. it's not an incomplete null, it's bleed. that's settled.

i can get the drums to very nearly null. i need to cut the eq on them by about 2 db at 50 hz, then boost the master eq by about 2 db at 80 hz. there's an izotope plugin on the master, and it comes in before the eq in the signal path, so that 80 hz boost has to be where it is and that 50 hz cut has to be where it is. i can't say to myself "maybe i split the difference and forgot". they're not interchangeable. in order for it to null, i have to cut the bass into izotope, and increase it out of izotope.

but, of course, anything i do to the master will affect the guitars. then, they no longer null. nor can i say "maybe i cut the guitars before they got to izotope". it doesn't work like that when you've got a plugin in the way.

this suggests two distinct signal paths in the earlier mix. but, i don't mix like that. i've never mixed like that. i'd never do that.

see, the funny thing about this is that it's an entirely rational mixing decision. you might decide the bass is coming in to the mix a little too heavy, take it down and then increase it on the way out. i don't remember doing that here. but i've done this countless times. it's a pretty normal mixing strategy. it doesn't seem like a random error. it seems like there's a fucker at a mixing desk.

i'm still convinced this is crazy. it's the kind of thing i'll never actually believe. i'll disconnect the internet. i'll rant about it all day. but, it's insane.

i'm the kind of person that would think i hallucinated it if god herself came down and slapped me upside the head. i could have a bruise. i'd think i fell somewhere. there's certain things that no amount of evidence can be convincing of. it's a sort of problem with being a cold rationalist. even if it's true, i can't accept it.

yet, i've determined that the old mix somehow sent the guitars and drums through different izotope instantiations, because there was a slight bass boost on one of them and no bass boost on the other - and the probability that this could have cancelled out any other way is so negligible it can't be seriously entertained.

my brain is unable to interpret that as a broken clock, because i can null with what i could call "elementary mixing operations". once a mathematician, always a mathematician. a 2 db boost at 80 hz is a common operation. a 2 db cut at 50 hz is a common operation. a broken clock would create the messy and random complications i was hearing, not uniform cuts at widely used frequencies - that in some sense cancel each other out.

i think, at this point, there's nothing of further value to be gained by trying to null these files. i'm going to shift the focus to determining if the device is currently consistent and flat. if i can prove this, i'll then go back to mixing it from scratch.

let be me clear on the following point: i cannot use mixes that i cannot recreate. whatever the cause, these mixes are useless to me.