i had spent the last three months frustrated by my inability to get the tone i wanted for this. often when i ran into that problem, putting it down for a few days and approaching it fresh solved it, but that wasn't working.
there was a power outage that knocked my computer out as i was running a part of the track through a transform. the track - and all the digital additions i had added to it - were largely destroyed. what was left was this completely corrupted wave file.
i've never been a religious person (obviously), and i don't want to say i took at as a sign or something. yet, i let chance assert itself; the corrupted wave file became the final version of the track, and i moved on to the next thing.
the closest thing to a completed version of the actual track is here:
http://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/circus
recorded in november, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/circus-original-album-mix
