the following reviews now have pictures:

http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2010/10/10.html  (hey rosetta, ottawa)
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2011/01/21.html (braids, ottawa)
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2011/05/10.html (nils frahm, ottawa)
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2011/07/10.html (a perfect circle / electronic picnic, ottawa)
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2011/10/05.html (valleys/suuns/ps i love you, ottawa)
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2011/11/05.html (sheezer, ottawa)

there will be more after 2012, as i kind of made it a habit to take shots before i went out, and still do.

i finally got up until the end of 2011 comprehensively finished before i slept, yesterday.

http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/index.html

i can't remember when i last updated this here, but i've uploaded a lot of videos here:


...and i've updated this list quite a bit, too:


i'm hoping i can get most of 2012 done today. it should be a lit faster, after that.

you ever had a headache for a month, solid?

the relief is the sweetest thing you can imagine, and while i'm aware that i'm under threat of relapse, i seem to at the least have developed a repeatably demonstrable solution to the problem.

so, did the aspirin fix the headache, or did the concussion just go away? i can't know. but, i think i'm going to be a little less apprehensive about taking aspirin going forwards, and a little less tied to some kind of hardcore notion of just toughing it out. i think i have reasons to periodically use it as a blood thinner...

or, maybe it was the blood work.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloodletting

so, i'm back from round two of the hospital visits (and i stopped to get a blood test, so it was about an hour and a half wait, if you're curious).

i want to be clear that i'm dealing with a serious head injury. whether my analyses turn out to be founded or not, i'm not wasting anybody's time in exploring the full range of possibilities regarding diagnoses, tests and treatment options. that said, i walked out of the hospital a little uneasy about the analysis, and without losing a feeling of needing to monitor myself closely.

after explaining the situation, he started by squashing the idea that i may have had any kind of stroke, mini-stroke or embolism on the night in question - he said there was no way i could have walked away from the situation after having a stroke (i'm not convinced that is true...), that i'm not showing symptoms of a stroke (i'm not sure this is true, either) and that the multitude of classic post-concussion symptoms should clarify the point: i was concussed.

so, it's official: i've been diagnosed with a concussion, and with post-concussion syndrome. that fact carries some weight with it. but, you'll take it for what it's worth, given that neither of us saw what happened.

i'm actually willing to go along with this, though. from this point on, we're going to assume the root cause of the situation was a concussion, and i'm going to have to invest some time into figuring out how that happened the next time that i'm in the vicinity of the club. again: the bouncer told me. but, i was just coming back into consciousness, and it's lost...

well, the next question is obvious: could i have developed clotting as a consequence of the concussion?

theoretically.

but?

but that would mean you'd be hemorrhaging badly, and you're just not showing those kinds of symptoms.

and that's solid? it's not possible that i could get clotting from mild bleeding?

what you're angling at is not impossible, but is extremely unlikely.

well, how do you explain the fact that the aspirin works after a long delay and for a long time, and the tylenol doesn't?

the truth is i can't. sometimes tylenol works, and sometimes aspirin works, and sometimes one works and the other doesn't, and sometimes they both work and sometimes neither do. there's no logic to it.

i suspect there's some logic to it...

there's no logic to it that anybody really understands. we're not even sure how they work.

hrmmmn. but, the absence of a systemic classification doesn't entirely rule out my deduction.

it doesn't. but, if you were dealing with clots, you'd be in far worse shape than you're in.

but, what i'm concerned about is the possibility that i'm developing clots. i obviously hadn't had a stroke yet. but, couldn't the aspirin be thinning the blood and preventing the clot from forming? and, if it is, and i'm on the brink...

there's no "on the brink". it's binary...

----

and, i'm going to stop here, because i know this is wrong. people take aspirin as blood thinners. it is clearly a thing. but, what do i do from this point? yell at him to take a blood test? demand anticoagulants? raise a workers revolt in the er room? demand him to present a source?

i did none of these things. i just sat quietly and waited for him to finish, aware that he had already decided i'm not under threat of anything, and was telling me lies in order to shuffle me out of the place.

i had already reasoned going in that i was unlikely to walk out of the place with anything more than an instruction to continue taking aspirin. what i wanted was a way to measure the concern, so i'd have some quantifiable measurement of the problem. if the situation persists, i'll have to try again.

for right now, i've actually avoided the aspirin up to this point for today. perhaps the pre-clot has been broken up by the aspirin, and that's the end of it. or, perhaps the effects of the concussion are subsiding.

but, i'll reiterate that i've been officially diagnosed with a concussion and post-concussion syndrome, that i need to continue to monitor this and that that might not be my last trip to the emergency room over this.

i should be transporting myself to the hospital right now, but the wind chill has picked up. take off, eh, right? the one night that i need to go for a walk...

my head has been clear enough since about 11:00 am. and, i've been chipping away at the list since around 5:00. but, i can feel it starting to come back, though. that's a clean 15 hours. aspirin just doesn't last 15 hours as an anti-inflammatory agent...

ugh. you can't blame me for not wanting to deal with this. but, no - i need to bundle up and get out the door.

i don't have an actual update to the html file, but the playlists have both update and i've got the first few months of 2012 done. i wanted more than this done, but, so be it...

i need to shave and go.

so, it's consistent - it takes the aspirin about an hour and a half to take effect, and over two hours to really work. when the aspirin is working, i can feel the headache as a dull stab in the back of my sinuses, if that makes sense, but it doesn't overtake me - it allows me to function. the aspirin then works in keeping the headache manageable for roughly 20 hours, before it gets debilitating again.

the last several times i took tylenol, it did not work at all.

i am neither a chemist nor a doctor, but the evidence in front of me suggests that the aspirin is functioning as an anti-coagulant, rather than as an anti-inflammatory drug. the reasons for this are due to the ineffectiveness of tylenol and both the delay in aspirin working, and the length of time it lasts for.

i am going to bring myself back to the hospital over night under the premises of concerns about clotting, and hope they can advise on immediate steps in a way that avoids a catscan.

i am probably not at risk for a heart attack, but i may be at risk for a stroke. and, i may have actually had a stroke on that night, due to the interaction of nicotine with estrogen.

ok.

i ain't dead yet...put the champagne away for at least another day...

the windows are closed. and, my headache is back, albeit not as bad as it was two days ago.

it's been long enough for me to take some more aspirin, and we will see in two-three hours from now if the relief is in the form of aspirin or fresh air, which will answer a more fundamental question: do i have a blood clot in my head?

if the aspirin resolves the pain, i am going to conclude that i do actually have a blood cot, and i'm going back to the hospital with this new evidence, which i believe eliminates the need for a cat scan in moving forwards.

hey. i'm a math nerd. this is what i do: i solve problems. and, i'm right. and, if you're a doctor, you know it, too.

i have this  playlist updated, now, which is actually a big step forwards.



and i'm going to stop to sleep...i've been awake since a little after midnight...

so, i have some good news in the sense that i got a full day in without serious headaches.

but, the real test is as to whether i wake up in the morning or not as i allow the aspirin's effects to wear off.

the windows have been closed for a few hours, and they have to be with the turn in the weather. the headache has actually stayed away, but it's like i'm walking a high wire act and prepared to fall off: i can feel the tension underneath, just waiting to reassert itself

i'm going to keep the windows closed for at least a few days, and we'll see what happens. do i wake up with a headache? does the aspirin work without opening the windows after all, and in such a way that suggests it's working as a blood thinner rather than an anti-inflammatory? and, if so what next...

i'm a little uneasy about this, actually. hopefully i'm still alive in a few hours and can get back to the more formal concert build-up.