Jessica Amber Murray
computer?
ESA
yeah. when u want me to bring it.
you can have the rest of the weed that I found
Monday, August 5, 2013
Re: hi again
From: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
To: d’s email address
i do think he'd want you to have those discs.
i'm going to wait until i get to windsor and have thought about it more carefully before i make any kind of list. i'm not very focused right this minute. and, in all honesty, some of those discs may even have gotten mixed up into my own things. i should check that as well.
really, though, it's just those two zappa discs that are screaming out at me to find them...
j
To: d’s email address
i do think he'd want you to have those discs.
i'm going to wait until i get to windsor and have thought about it more carefully before i make any kind of list. i'm not very focused right this minute. and, in all honesty, some of those discs may even have gotten mixed up into my own things. i should check that as well.
really, though, it's just those two zappa discs that are screaming out at me to find them...
j
(no subject heading)
From: stepmother’s email address
To: "'Jessica Murray'" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
If you are doing anything today I need to know soon.
To: "'Jessica Murray'" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
If you are doing anything today I need to know soon.
Re: hi again
From: d’s email address
To: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
Well after reading your 2 e-mails yesterday, I'm left with the following feelings.
1. You are making a great deal of assumptions.
2. You seem to have given yourself a great deal of self entitlement.
Now as for the CD's. I have a feeling you will be greatly disappointed since I likely do not have what you are looking for. You are correct, I do have some of your dads CD's. I do have a few prog things like the Flower Kings, Tomas Bolin, Spock's Beard, Pain of Salvation, Dream Theater. A few others would have been non-prog related such at Gary Moore, Robben Ford, Joni Mitchell. While I did take some discs, I also left a great deal of things since I already own a lot of what your dad had or have a burn of it already. What you should keep in mind is your dad has sold some of his discs and has also lent a lot of them them out over the past couple of years. I know this for a fact since he dropped a small box of CD's off at the Turning Point last year, I drove him. When I went through the disc's I notice a lot that were not there that I know he owned. Flower Kings, Allman Bros, Zappa, Yes, etc.. just to name a few. I don't believe he would sell these bands, so on loan seems more logical. At this point in time, I would recommend you send me a list of the specific discs you are looking for. If I happen to have taken any of these, I will consider mailing them to you in Windsor once you have moved there.
I want to thank you for the good chuckle that you gave me with the father/son analysis you seem to think your dad and I had. I've been in need of a good laugh lately. I have no intent on going into great details with you regarding the bond your father & I shared except to say that it was more brotherly than anything else. I can see how you got confused in your analysis since it could be viewed as a younger brother/older brother relationship since you seem to think age has some sort of relevancy here.
To: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
Well after reading your 2 e-mails yesterday, I'm left with the following feelings.
1. You are making a great deal of assumptions.
2. You seem to have given yourself a great deal of self entitlement.
Now as for the CD's. I have a feeling you will be greatly disappointed since I likely do not have what you are looking for. You are correct, I do have some of your dads CD's. I do have a few prog things like the Flower Kings, Tomas Bolin, Spock's Beard, Pain of Salvation, Dream Theater. A few others would have been non-prog related such at Gary Moore, Robben Ford, Joni Mitchell. While I did take some discs, I also left a great deal of things since I already own a lot of what your dad had or have a burn of it already. What you should keep in mind is your dad has sold some of his discs and has also lent a lot of them them out over the past couple of years. I know this for a fact since he dropped a small box of CD's off at the Turning Point last year, I drove him. When I went through the disc's I notice a lot that were not there that I know he owned. Flower Kings, Allman Bros, Zappa, Yes, etc.. just to name a few. I don't believe he would sell these bands, so on loan seems more logical. At this point in time, I would recommend you send me a list of the specific discs you are looking for. If I happen to have taken any of these, I will consider mailing them to you in Windsor once you have moved there.
I want to thank you for the good chuckle that you gave me with the father/son analysis you seem to think your dad and I had. I've been in need of a good laugh lately. I have no intent on going into great details with you regarding the bond your father & I shared except to say that it was more brotherly than anything else. I can see how you got confused in your analysis since it could be viewed as a younger brother/older brother relationship since you seem to think age has some sort of relevancy here.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
time to go out
ESA
Jess????
R u comi.g?
Jessica Amber Murray
sure
should i go now?
ESA
Lol i sent u like 8 msgs. Yeh im ready
Jessica Amber Murray
they didn't come through....i'll be there in a few minutes...
Jess????
R u comi.g?
Jessica Amber Murray
sure
should i go now?
ESA
Lol i sent u like 8 msgs. Yeh im ready
Jessica Amber Murray
they didn't come through....i'll be there in a few minutes...
we decided i should gorge myself with multi-course hintonburger in private and meet up again later
ESA
hey u wanna meet like at 8:30 ?
or smtng
8 ?
I forgot to get u to buy smokes. plus I dunno if u wanna play risk.
that's usually when I stop being tired and headachy during the day
Jessica Amber Murray
yeah, i'm good for 8.
or 8:30
ESA
don't mattah
Jessica Amber Murray
i'll just be sitting here, so msg me whenever.
ESA
kk
yeah you live close.
hey u wanna meet like at 8:30 ?
or smtng
8 ?
I forgot to get u to buy smokes. plus I dunno if u wanna play risk.
that's usually when I stop being tired and headachy during the day
Jessica Amber Murray
yeah, i'm good for 8.
or 8:30
ESA
don't mattah
Jessica Amber Murray
i'll just be sitting here, so msg me whenever.
ESA
kk
yeah you live close.
the hintonburger is a fine meal.
ESA
hey jessica
i'm going to the bank and then the lcbo if u wanna come
it'll be fun!
in about 30 minute s
Jessica Amber Murray
actually, i wanna get one last hintonburger in me, so, yeah, i'll go.
ESA
what does that have anything to do with that?
i'm confused
are you having a going away party ?
Jessica Amber Murray
well, it's in the same general direction... no going away party...
ESA
hmrph
Jessica Amber Murray
??
ok, well, i'm having a smoke and then i'm shaving so msg me when you're ready.
ESA
i'm ready
been up for 6.5 hours already
lolll
practiced piano, went to church, cleaned out my cupboards. I gotta make up for lost time.
Jessica Amber Murray
you said a half hour, that gives me time to smoke and shave. so, i'll msg you in 20-30 minutes then :P
ESA
ok.
or just come in 20 or 30 minutes
are you gonna get a hintonburger after?
Jessica Amber Murray
i dunno, i'll get there eventually.
ESA
K i'm down with getting a corn dog later
Jessica Amber Murray
(to hintonburger eventually. i'll stop by after i shave)
ESA
except now i'm officially gluten free. Officially I threw out all the pasta and bread from myhouse.
no more pizza and burger and beer for me
Jessica Amber Murray
you're probably better off cutting out the doritos and cigarettes, but i'm always in support of people making more healthy lifestyle decisions.
ESA
no. its because i'm celiac. I don't have the 150 dollars to get tested for it,
but before I had the same symptoms Ive been having, and I cut out the gluten, and the symptoms stopped. but then being "gluten-free" became some sort of yuppie bullshit trend, so I started drinking beer and eating pizza.
Its either i'm celiac or I have colitis.
but like 90% sure its the first one.
And I wont be able to eat doritos either.
Jessica Amber Murray
ok, i'll be there in a few minutes.
hey jessica
i'm going to the bank and then the lcbo if u wanna come
it'll be fun!
in about 30 minute s
Jessica Amber Murray
actually, i wanna get one last hintonburger in me, so, yeah, i'll go.
ESA
what does that have anything to do with that?
i'm confused
are you having a going away party ?
Jessica Amber Murray
well, it's in the same general direction... no going away party...
ESA
hmrph
Jessica Amber Murray
??
ok, well, i'm having a smoke and then i'm shaving so msg me when you're ready.
ESA
i'm ready
been up for 6.5 hours already
lolll
practiced piano, went to church, cleaned out my cupboards. I gotta make up for lost time.
Jessica Amber Murray
you said a half hour, that gives me time to smoke and shave. so, i'll msg you in 20-30 minutes then :P
ESA
ok.
or just come in 20 or 30 minutes
are you gonna get a hintonburger after?
Jessica Amber Murray
i dunno, i'll get there eventually.
ESA
K i'm down with getting a corn dog later
Jessica Amber Murray
(to hintonburger eventually. i'll stop by after i shave)
ESA
except now i'm officially gluten free. Officially I threw out all the pasta and bread from myhouse.
no more pizza and burger and beer for me
Jessica Amber Murray
you're probably better off cutting out the doritos and cigarettes, but i'm always in support of people making more healthy lifestyle decisions.
ESA
no. its because i'm celiac. I don't have the 150 dollars to get tested for it,
but before I had the same symptoms Ive been having, and I cut out the gluten, and the symptoms stopped. but then being "gluten-free" became some sort of yuppie bullshit trend, so I started drinking beer and eating pizza.
Its either i'm celiac or I have colitis.
but like 90% sure its the first one.
And I wont be able to eat doritos either.
Jessica Amber Murray
ok, i'll be there in a few minutes.
Jessica Amber Murray
ok, so what are the logistics regarding monday? it doesn't seem like i'm going to get a ride. i need to get myself and some stuff (it's not a lot of stuff) from here to the truck, somehow. so, my options are as follows: 1) i could take a taxi-van. that's fine, if it's easiest. 2) i could hope nana gets home in time and give me a lift. if not, taxi. 3) the truck could come here first. is it driving by here anyways? 4) the truck could come here second. given that we'd have to take the 417 to at least bayshore, it's pretty much on the way. i'll have everything packed - it'll take 10-15 minutes to get it downstairs and into the truck. any option is fine. obviously, i'd rather avoid paying the cab fare. just let me know what makes sense and what doesn't.
ok, so what are the logistics regarding monday? it doesn't seem like i'm going to get a ride. i need to get myself and some stuff (it's not a lot of stuff) from here to the truck, somehow. so, my options are as follows: 1) i could take a taxi-van. that's fine, if it's easiest. 2) i could hope nana gets home in time and give me a lift. if not, taxi. 3) the truck could come here first. is it driving by here anyways? 4) the truck could come here second. given that we'd have to take the 417 to at least bayshore, it's pretty much on the way. i'll have everything packed - it'll take 10-15 minutes to get it downstairs and into the truck. any option is fine. obviously, i'd rather avoid paying the cab fare. just let me know what makes sense and what doesn't.
ok...
From: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
To: stepmother’s email address
i'm having trouble finding a ride.
i'm going to try to phone my grandmother again today. she's at her cottage, and it doesn't seem like leo is answering his cell. i know she'll be back on monday, but i'm not sure when. if i get a ride before then, i'll let you know, but it's not likely.
there are a few things that could work, but they all seem to get me there for monday around 5-6. the truck could maybe come here first; i need to get from here to there anyways. i don't know the logistics behind picking my mother up. my grandmother could be back in time. if she's not home by 4:45, i'll call a taxi-van and plan to be there for between 5:30 and 6:00.
...the point being that it doesn't seem likely at this point that i'll be able to get the stuff there before the general moving time.
j
To: stepmother’s email address
i'm having trouble finding a ride.
i'm going to try to phone my grandmother again today. she's at her cottage, and it doesn't seem like leo is answering his cell. i know she'll be back on monday, but i'm not sure when. if i get a ride before then, i'll let you know, but it's not likely.
there are a few things that could work, but they all seem to get me there for monday around 5-6. the truck could maybe come here first; i need to get from here to there anyways. i don't know the logistics behind picking my mother up. my grandmother could be back in time. if she's not home by 4:45, i'll call a taxi-van and plan to be there for between 5:30 and 6:00.
...the point being that it doesn't seem likely at this point that i'll be able to get the stuff there before the general moving time.
j
minivan
From: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
To: <shuttlejetservices@gmail.com>
i'm just wondering if the minivan is more than the car (with you guys, and in general), and if you do flat rates or everything by the minute?
i need to get a handful of boxes and a table from hintonburg to leitrim, and i'm trying to do it as cheaply as possible.
j
To: <shuttlejetservices@gmail.com>
i'm just wondering if the minivan is more than the car (with you guys, and in general), and if you do flat rates or everything by the minute?
i need to get a handful of boxes and a table from hintonburg to leitrim, and i'm trying to do it as cheaply as possible.
j
an empty request, thrown out into the void
can you do me a major favour?
can you drive me to my dad's place tomorrow or monday? whatever time is good for you. well, before 12:00 (noon) on monday.
i need a lift, and nothing's panning out. i just need to get some boxes from here to there.
mmmmmaybe we could get a coffee after.
i'm leaving for windsor monday night.
forever.
j
can you drive me to my dad's place tomorrow or monday? whatever time is good for you. well, before 12:00 (noon) on monday.
i need a lift, and nothing's panning out. i just need to get some boxes from here to there.
mmmmmaybe we could get a coffee after.
i'm leaving for windsor monday night.
forever.
j
Saturday, August 3, 2013
Jessica Amber Murray
did you get your dad's netbook yet? can you get it by monday?
also, what are you up to tonight? i think i'm finally feeling social. yesterday was fucking ridiculous, i spent all day tracking my dad's cds down at used stores...
ESA
uhmmm dunno what i'm up to... sleeping. not feeling superrr social. maybe we can hang out tomorrow? and i'll give u your laptop
Jessica Amber Murray
that works.
ESA
Saweetttt
did you get your dad's netbook yet? can you get it by monday?
also, what are you up to tonight? i think i'm finally feeling social. yesterday was fucking ridiculous, i spent all day tracking my dad's cds down at used stores...
ESA
uhmmm dunno what i'm up to... sleeping. not feeling superrr social. maybe we can hang out tomorrow? and i'll give u your laptop
Jessica Amber Murray
that works.
ESA
Saweetttt
bicycle?
From: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
To: stepmother’s email address
how much would you want for that bicycle? or do you want me to just take it off your hands?
i kind of screwed mine up a little worse than i thought. i was trying to straighten the handle bars, and i ended up losing a lot of the ball bearings that allow the front handle bars to turn (i twisted the wrong allan key open). it's still rideable, but it's not very safe unless i'm moving fairly slowly because turning is very jagged.
i took a walk down to the closest store and the guy in the store said it'll cost about $50 to fix it. i mean, i just need to get the ball bearings in, but i've never done that before, so i'd rather get somebody to do it. the thing is that that bike in your garage is the same model. so, if i can get that bike cheaper, it would make more sense to keep the one i have for spare parts...or fix it and keep it as a backup in case i've got a flat or something. i had two bikes for a long time and found it very convenient for that reason.
j
To: stepmother’s email address
how much would you want for that bicycle? or do you want me to just take it off your hands?
i kind of screwed mine up a little worse than i thought. i was trying to straighten the handle bars, and i ended up losing a lot of the ball bearings that allow the front handle bars to turn (i twisted the wrong allan key open). it's still rideable, but it's not very safe unless i'm moving fairly slowly because turning is very jagged.
i took a walk down to the closest store and the guy in the store said it'll cost about $50 to fix it. i mean, i just need to get the ball bearings in, but i've never done that before, so i'd rather get somebody to do it. the thing is that that bike in your garage is the same model. so, if i can get that bike cheaper, it would make more sense to keep the one i have for spare parts...or fix it and keep it as a backup in case i've got a flat or something. i had two bikes for a long time and found it very convenient for that reason.
j
Re: my father's cds
From: the surviving uncle’s email address
To: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
Well, it sounds to me like you have a pretty good handle on the situation, all of them actually. People rarely deal with the real issues and if they do, it's usually a long time coming. Nobody expected your dad to go as quickly as he did and as you well know it's not something that could have been predicted with any kind of accuracy. You had a chance to say goodbye and that's what counts. Often, we don't get that opportunity.
there were frequent occasions when my dad talked about leaving her. he always said he couldn't leave her because she'd self-destruct into a rage and possibly even harm herself. i'm a little worried she's in the process of doing this, but i don't know a way i can help and i'm even worried that if i try it'll make things worse.
We talked about this often. He did his part and though he may have hoped you would have some sort of relationship with her, he didn't really expect it would happen as he was not delusional. I wouldn't send anything to ferris as it really no longer concerns you in any way. Let her family worry about her. Your dad wanted you to take care of yourself and for you to be happy. So do that. Do it for you and do it for him.
We (your dad's family) do very much consider you family, so keep in touch and let us know where you are and how we can reach you. If there is anything we can help with, let us know.
To: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
Well, it sounds to me like you have a pretty good handle on the situation, all of them actually. People rarely deal with the real issues and if they do, it's usually a long time coming. Nobody expected your dad to go as quickly as he did and as you well know it's not something that could have been predicted with any kind of accuracy. You had a chance to say goodbye and that's what counts. Often, we don't get that opportunity.
there were frequent occasions when my dad talked about leaving her. he always said he couldn't leave her because she'd self-destruct into a rage and possibly even harm herself. i'm a little worried she's in the process of doing this, but i don't know a way i can help and i'm even worried that if i try it'll make things worse.
We talked about this often. He did his part and though he may have hoped you would have some sort of relationship with her, he didn't really expect it would happen as he was not delusional. I wouldn't send anything to ferris as it really no longer concerns you in any way. Let her family worry about her. Your dad wanted you to take care of yourself and for you to be happy. So do that. Do it for you and do it for him.
We (your dad's family) do very much consider you family, so keep in touch and let us know where you are and how we can reach you. If there is anything we can help with, let us know.
Re: my father's cds
From: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
To: the surviving uncle’s email address
i'll be picking my stuff up and leaving on monday.
it turns out d has a bunch of them. i'm hoping he'll let me sort through them. there's only a handful more of them that i was hoping for, but, if not, in all honesty, the fact that i have at least a few is sort of enough. most of the stuff i wanted is really easy to find anywhere: dark side, sgt peppers, aladin sane...stuff that you can get for $1 at any garage sale...but stuff that i was really attached to. off of the top of my head, the only other things i was hoping to find were joe's garage and the apostrophe/overnite sensation split.
she's actually giving me a lot of stuff, and i appreciate that, and i do trust her to at least not destroy the things i have. i can only hope that trust is properly placed. if there's significant damage, i'm going to have to sue her. she *is* legally obligated not to harm property that doesn't belong to her, and she understands that. if she chooses to act otherwise, she'll have to take responsibility for that. i don't want to do that, obviously...
the thing i understand is that this isn't actually about me, even if it seems like it is at first. when she's upset or does things that don't seem to make much sense, it's rarely about what's on the surface. what she does is pick scapegoats and then heap all kinds of abuse on to them. i mean, she's obviously upset right now, and has a good reason to be. what she's doing is taking out all of her grief and anger and frustration and hurt on me because i'm the scapegoat she's picked for that. she doesn't require a good reason to do that. often, she doesn't require any reason at all, or will make up a reason to justify it. if i want to get clinical, it's sort of a classic example of somebody passing on abusive behaviour across generations.
so, maybe she's a little upset that i wasn't there at the very end. i don't really know what to say other than that my relationship with my father is something that existed between my father and i. i spent a lot of time with him the week before i left, because i wasn't sure if he'd make it until i got back. and i even asked her - is he expected to make it through the week? should i reschedule? and she told me it would be fine and i should go. on top of that, i had a really emotional conversation with him the night before i left. it was a goodbye call. it felt final. despite what she said about him making it through the week, when i left i felt the goodbyes had been said. i expected to not see him again. and i was at peace with that. again, that's between me and my dad, not between me and the stepmother.
to an extent, she might be internalizing that. she told me he'd still be here when i got back, and he wasn't, so she might be feeling guilty about that. of course that's not her fault, and i wouldn't blame her for it. but if she *feels* like it's her fault, then her response would be to reject that guilt and project it on to somebody else. and, of course, i'm the convenient scape goat. it's even easier, in this circumstance, given the context.
so, she would be able to construct an elaborate fantasy about me not loving my father as a shield to protect her from that guilt that she shouldn't be feeling in the first place. if i didn't love my father, i shouldn't get anything from him.
this seems complex and arbitrary, but she has a lot of complex issues, and i've dealt a lot with them over the years. i feel i have a certain power of psycho-analysis through experience. it's certainly *something* like this - she is *somehow* projecting all her hurt and sadness on to me as a release, and it's neither my fault nor does it really have much to do with me at all.
but, you're right - i can't talk it through with her. i always needed dad to do that.
it's just a few more days...
when i'm gone, she'll key on somebody else. it's not going to end until she can come to terms with things and understand what she's doing. but, realistically, just about every approach has been tried over 35 or 40 years, so i don't know what's going to happen.
there were frequent occasions when my dad talked about leaving her. he always said he couldn't leave her because she'd self-destruct into a rage and possibly even harm herself. i'm a little worried she's in the process of doing this, but i don't know a way i can help and i'm even worried that if i try it'll make things worse.
i'll probably wait until i leave and then send something to her brother, ferris.
j
To: the surviving uncle’s email address
i'll be picking my stuff up and leaving on monday.
it turns out d has a bunch of them. i'm hoping he'll let me sort through them. there's only a handful more of them that i was hoping for, but, if not, in all honesty, the fact that i have at least a few is sort of enough. most of the stuff i wanted is really easy to find anywhere: dark side, sgt peppers, aladin sane...stuff that you can get for $1 at any garage sale...but stuff that i was really attached to. off of the top of my head, the only other things i was hoping to find were joe's garage and the apostrophe/overnite sensation split.
she's actually giving me a lot of stuff, and i appreciate that, and i do trust her to at least not destroy the things i have. i can only hope that trust is properly placed. if there's significant damage, i'm going to have to sue her. she *is* legally obligated not to harm property that doesn't belong to her, and she understands that. if she chooses to act otherwise, she'll have to take responsibility for that. i don't want to do that, obviously...
the thing i understand is that this isn't actually about me, even if it seems like it is at first. when she's upset or does things that don't seem to make much sense, it's rarely about what's on the surface. what she does is pick scapegoats and then heap all kinds of abuse on to them. i mean, she's obviously upset right now, and has a good reason to be. what she's doing is taking out all of her grief and anger and frustration and hurt on me because i'm the scapegoat she's picked for that. she doesn't require a good reason to do that. often, she doesn't require any reason at all, or will make up a reason to justify it. if i want to get clinical, it's sort of a classic example of somebody passing on abusive behaviour across generations.
so, maybe she's a little upset that i wasn't there at the very end. i don't really know what to say other than that my relationship with my father is something that existed between my father and i. i spent a lot of time with him the week before i left, because i wasn't sure if he'd make it until i got back. and i even asked her - is he expected to make it through the week? should i reschedule? and she told me it would be fine and i should go. on top of that, i had a really emotional conversation with him the night before i left. it was a goodbye call. it felt final. despite what she said about him making it through the week, when i left i felt the goodbyes had been said. i expected to not see him again. and i was at peace with that. again, that's between me and my dad, not between me and the stepmother.
to an extent, she might be internalizing that. she told me he'd still be here when i got back, and he wasn't, so she might be feeling guilty about that. of course that's not her fault, and i wouldn't blame her for it. but if she *feels* like it's her fault, then her response would be to reject that guilt and project it on to somebody else. and, of course, i'm the convenient scape goat. it's even easier, in this circumstance, given the context.
so, she would be able to construct an elaborate fantasy about me not loving my father as a shield to protect her from that guilt that she shouldn't be feeling in the first place. if i didn't love my father, i shouldn't get anything from him.
this seems complex and arbitrary, but she has a lot of complex issues, and i've dealt a lot with them over the years. i feel i have a certain power of psycho-analysis through experience. it's certainly *something* like this - she is *somehow* projecting all her hurt and sadness on to me as a release, and it's neither my fault nor does it really have much to do with me at all.
but, you're right - i can't talk it through with her. i always needed dad to do that.
it's just a few more days...
when i'm gone, she'll key on somebody else. it's not going to end until she can come to terms with things and understand what she's doing. but, realistically, just about every approach has been tried over 35 or 40 years, so i don't know what's going to happen.
there were frequent occasions when my dad talked about leaving her. he always said he couldn't leave her because she'd self-destruct into a rage and possibly even harm herself. i'm a little worried she's in the process of doing this, but i don't know a way i can help and i'm even worried that if i try it'll make things worse.
i'll probably wait until i leave and then send something to her brother, ferris.
j
Re: my father's cds
From: the surviving uncle’s email address
To: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
J, people do hurtful things. Sometimes all you can do is try be be a better person than the ones hurting you. You are aware of what is going on and I believe that the only stuff you will get is the stuff you have retrieved on your own. As much as it hurts, at least you have what you have gotten back. The only cd's I got were given to me by your dad and they were 10 or 11 cd's that were the dead uncle’s. You are not in a good bargaining position and need to play what cards you do have, well.
I'm not 100% certain, but I believe strongly that a box of your dad's personal effects have been put aside for you with your things. I would not even ask about them. All you would be doing is saying, "here is another way to hurt me". I would drop the cd issue, there is nothing you or anyone else can do about it. There is not much to figure out, I think what is going on is pretty clear.
Speaking from personal experience, what I would do (and what your dad would tell you) is do nothing. Don't inquire about anything else. Just get your things as soon as possible and with as little fanfare as possible. Sometimes taking the high road brings surprising results. You are in a very tough spot, try to not let your feelings make it worse.
If you are not in a position to get your things to Windsor right now, maybe the best thing would be to hire a small local mover for an hour or two and put your stuff in a storage locker for now. At least you would be able to see what was given to you and you would know that it is safe.
Considering what is going on, I think that's your best bet. If you don't feel you can trust someone or a situation, then don’t.
To: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
J, people do hurtful things. Sometimes all you can do is try be be a better person than the ones hurting you. You are aware of what is going on and I believe that the only stuff you will get is the stuff you have retrieved on your own. As much as it hurts, at least you have what you have gotten back. The only cd's I got were given to me by your dad and they were 10 or 11 cd's that were the dead uncle’s. You are not in a good bargaining position and need to play what cards you do have, well.
I'm not 100% certain, but I believe strongly that a box of your dad's personal effects have been put aside for you with your things. I would not even ask about them. All you would be doing is saying, "here is another way to hurt me". I would drop the cd issue, there is nothing you or anyone else can do about it. There is not much to figure out, I think what is going on is pretty clear.
Speaking from personal experience, what I would do (and what your dad would tell you) is do nothing. Don't inquire about anything else. Just get your things as soon as possible and with as little fanfare as possible. Sometimes taking the high road brings surprising results. You are in a very tough spot, try to not let your feelings make it worse.
If you are not in a position to get your things to Windsor right now, maybe the best thing would be to hire a small local mover for an hour or two and put your stuff in a storage locker for now. At least you would be able to see what was given to you and you would know that it is safe.
Considering what is going on, I think that's your best bet. If you don't feel you can trust someone or a situation, then don’t.
Friday, August 2, 2013
RE: moving day
From: stepmother’s email address
To: "'Jessica Murray'" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
Just make sure if the truck is cheap it is not leaking oil or it will have to stay parked on the street. Monday evening sounds fine but I will confirm.
A few hours notice to stick the rest of your stuff in the garage is fine.
To: "'Jessica Murray'" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
Just make sure if the truck is cheap it is not leaking oil or it will have to stay parked on the street. Monday evening sounds fine but I will confirm.
A few hours notice to stick the rest of your stuff in the garage is fine.
moving day
From: "Jessica Murray" <dfhldgdhdlhfdla@gmail.com>
To: stepmother’s email address, d’s email address
he says he can get the truck between 4-6 on monday. he's a truck mechanic, so he's puling strings to get something cheap, and that's sort of the best time frame he can give me. that means he'll be there between 4:30-7:00. we'll be loading up and leaving monday night.
i know monday's a holiday. i dunno if it's actually a holiday or not, though. as it's a holiday, i understand it's not the same as dropping by after work, but that's when he can do it. that being said, i don't know if that means it's a bad day for you, d, or if the 5:30 thing no longer applies or what...
if the truck is there too early, i guess i can go down and grab a sub or something.
now, my grandmother is at the cottage until monday night, so she's not going to be able to drive the few things i have over. i suppose multiple bus trips would be out of the question because i'd have to show up by myself (and that's scary, or something; whatever, not worth it). so, i'm left asking around for a ride. i need to ask: if i give you a few hours notice, would you be ok with a friend and i dropping off what's left? i could maybe give you more than a few hours, but i can't say. you'd literally just have to open the garage door for five minutes.
if you're not ok with a friend and i, i guess the other option is me asking around with people you trust. does anybody have a van or a large car? that would make the most sense. it's just bags of cloths, a couple of small boxes and a table that i could take or leave (i found it downstairs, and i like it, but if i can't move it out of here then so be it). i could do this saturday, sunday or monday morning depending on who is available when.
j
To: stepmother’s email address, d’s email address
he says he can get the truck between 4-6 on monday. he's a truck mechanic, so he's puling strings to get something cheap, and that's sort of the best time frame he can give me. that means he'll be there between 4:30-7:00. we'll be loading up and leaving monday night.
i know monday's a holiday. i dunno if it's actually a holiday or not, though. as it's a holiday, i understand it's not the same as dropping by after work, but that's when he can do it. that being said, i don't know if that means it's a bad day for you, d, or if the 5:30 thing no longer applies or what...
if the truck is there too early, i guess i can go down and grab a sub or something.
now, my grandmother is at the cottage until monday night, so she's not going to be able to drive the few things i have over. i suppose multiple bus trips would be out of the question because i'd have to show up by myself (and that's scary, or something; whatever, not worth it). so, i'm left asking around for a ride. i need to ask: if i give you a few hours notice, would you be ok with a friend and i dropping off what's left? i could maybe give you more than a few hours, but i can't say. you'd literally just have to open the garage door for five minutes.
if you're not ok with a friend and i, i guess the other option is me asking around with people you trust. does anybody have a van or a large car? that would make the most sense. it's just bags of cloths, a couple of small boxes and a table that i could take or leave (i found it downstairs, and i like it, but if i can't move it out of here then so be it). i could do this saturday, sunday or monday morning depending on who is available when.
j
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