a man for all seasons / thomas more's utopia. grade 8. that's clear. but, it was handed out in loose leaf, i think. i also vaguely recall some kind of shakespeare for grade 8. i guess we did shakespeare every year almost - hamlet, macbeth, merchant of venice, romeo & juliet, henry viiii, a mid...yeah. that was eight. midsummer night's dream. i remember the plays relatively well, but i always took shakespeare as a chore, and it's not well-ordered in time in my mind. i think the merchant was 9, romeo & juliet was 10, macbeth was 11 and hamlet was 12, but that could be completely wrong. i have a vague recollection of something atwood as well. and some sherlock holmes, too....

well, that's something, anyways.

it's the old english, that was my issue with shakespeare. i know a lot of people like it for that reason, but, to me, shakespeare should be catalogued with chaucer - it's a mild degree of separation, and well past the point of incomprehension; it's far enough back in time, now, that a translator really ought to be deployed. it just struck me as needlessly frustrating. but, i was a kid that liked to read, so i think i would have enjoyed it much more had they just translated it for me. we'll see how i react to it the second time over...

grade seven is still a dead block, but my teacher got fired early in the year and the class kind of fell through the cracks. after five or six substitutes that were sequentially brought in as babysitters, they finally hired one. we lost at least half the year. but, i'm remembering a grade 7 "english textbook" that was all highlightered up from previous use, and a really boring story by a gordon something that was in the textbook. this was just painful to trudge through - enough to make a kid hate reading for life. this is the consequence of the "canadian content" requirements, and a teacher that didn't really give a fuck. so, i think what i need to find is the textbook. english class at that point no doubt had an actual language component, which was no doubt the focus of the textbook.

was there a grade eight "english textbook" with excerpts in it? i'm thinking that's the answer, and why my memories are so dismal around it. my grade eight teacher was a rather finicky old woman, and she may have photocopied the textbook out of fears we'd spill juice on it.

i wouldn't mind trying to track down the math & science textbooks from high school, while i'm at it.

that just randomly vomited up on me, which is how this often works. i've been offline for the last few days, because i've had difficulties staying awake. i'm still filing; it should be done, but i've been sleeping 20 hours a day. the air quality in here has just collapsed, but it's only in the one room, leading me to wonder if it's mostly the window, after all.

i'm going to get some more coal the next time i'm out and see if it helps a little.

the first asimov text is here from the uk, but dhl made a scan error and is trying to charge me customs on a purchase under $20. it should be here as soon as that is ironed out, so i could in theory get started this week.

but, not with the air quality like this, i won't. i'm going to have to get to the bottom of this - as of right now, i'm basically in the same problem i was in before.

i can't and don't want to live the life of a lethargic drug addict.

well, it cost me $212.79, which works out to $15.10/book, but it should all be here by monday, with the exception of the complete robot, which should be here within three weeks.

the complete robot was $36, and i got tricked - i had my default address set to the ups store in detroit, which would have been free shipping. i agreed to the transaction, then got dinged on shipping into canada, which ended up as $15. you'll note it would cost me $10 to get back and forth anyways, but i might have found a cheaper seller. this particular text appears to be scarce in canada, but i could have probably taken it down a little. $5-7 or something.

so, if you take that one out, the average is more like $13.65, which is reasonable, considering everything is shipping.

and, the way we'll do this is that i'll have just read through the asimov texts - that will be the starting point of the blog, a total review of the greater foundation series.

so, should i be buying physical books in 2019?

well, i still like to hold a book, and part of the point of this is to rebuild the shelf, after years of neglect. i'm not sure that this overpowers the unnecessary environmental effects of actually buying books at this stage in history, though.

i should probably look at this the same way that i look at clothes, and am increasingly looking at cds: i should be looking towards used books almost exclusively.

am i apprehensive about buying used books online? yeah. it's easy to lose a few pages. and, i should also be seeking to minimize transportation costs.

it's been a while since i've hit the used book stores in windsor.

it looks like it may be nice on sunday.

i only have three stephen king books left on my shelf.

1) the tommyknockers
2) the bachman books (rage, the long walk, roadwork, the running man)
3) the stand (complete & uncut)

but, i had a big list of them, which also included:

- carrie
- salem's lot
- the shining
- night shift (short stories) 
- the dead zone
- firestarter
- cujo
- danse macabre 
- different seasons (shawshank redemption, apt pupil, the body, the breathing method)
- pet semetary
- the talisman
- thinner 
- skeleton crew (short stories)
- it
- misery
- the dark half
- four past midnight (the langoliers, secret window secret garden, the library policeman, the sun dog) 
- needful things
- gerald's game
- dolores clairborne
- nightmares & dreamscapes

i never read christine, and regretted it. the only other thing that's missing here is the dark tower series, which i skipped on purpose. that is otherwise an almost entirely complete stephen king bibliography, up to the end of 1993.

i'm not exaggerating - i went through all of this stuff over the years 92-94. that's like 10,000 pages of stephen king, mostly in the middle of the night. the move from my mom's to my dad's was the summer of 1994, and while there were some perks attached to it, i initially had to give up my all night reading habit because he would actually storm downstairs and tell me go to fucking sleep, whereas my mom was herself usually up all night chain smoking and watching tv. i also became much more interested in the guitar after mid-94.

am i going to buy all of those books? yeah. and, i'm going to move through this sequentially.

i don't know how much these cost, nowadays. you used to be able to get them at the drug store for $5. let's see what i can get shipped to me. and, i'll have to hit the local used stores afterwards.

but, i'm going to start with asimov, because that's more primordial for me. even as i'm pointing out that i don't remember doing a single book report from grades 7-9, i know i did a book report on the foundation series in grade five. i was in a split 5/6 class, so i didn't have english class in grade six (and didn't have math class in grade five). in hindisght, it is baffling, but my mom freely sent me to that school solely because it had a large yard. yeah. the foundation series was recommended to me by the teacher, and i ended up reading a bunch of his other stuff. asimov died in 1992 with a massive bibliography, but i remember these specifically:

- the complete robot
- caves of steel
- naked sun
- robots of dawn
- robots and empire
- the stars, like dust
- currents of space
- pebble in the sky
- prelude to foundation
- forward the foundation <----did not read this one
- foundation
- foundation and empire
- second foundation
- foundations edge <----- that was the book report
- foundation and earth

so, i read through that over 1992-1993. i should collect it all, and review it all as a starting point. all i have right now is foundation and empire, and a book of short stories called the martian way.

what else did i mention?

arthur c. clarke.

i had:

- 2001: a space odyssey
- 2010: odyssey two
- 2061: odyssey three
- songs of distant earth 
- tales from planet earth

my grandmother bought me these books by accident, starting around 91. she was trying to buy me greek mythology, to have me understand my name sake. i don't think she ever read any homer herself, nor had my mother, but she was trying to give me a story about jason and the argonauts, by giving me what she thought was the odyssey. d'oh? well, i enjoyed them, nonetheless, so she kept buying them. i eventually read both some plato and homer in high school, as well as some aristophanes in first year. fuck aristotle.

the only one i have left is songs of distant earth, which helpfully is dated to the christmas of 1993. so, we can go through that one together for an early '94 post.

bradbury.

- the martian chronicles
- farenheit 451 <----- not actually, but if i'm going to do this... 
- a medicine for melancholy
- r is for rocket
- i sing the body electric 
- dinosaur tales

i remember the bradbury a lot less. i know i at least flipped through these ones.

i do remember some specific hg wells:

- time machine
- island of dr moreau
- war of the worlds

and also some jules verne:

- journey to the centre of the earth
- twenty thousand leagues under the sea

the wells & verne were probably the result of the influence of my aunt on my mother and grandmother, who was an english major at mcgill in this period.

i'm going to push the clancy, koontz & rand forward a few years, because my memory of it is specifically connected to my dad's house. there was some crichton, too.

there would have also been some twain read over this period, again thanks to nana:

- tom sawyer (daa-da da-daaaa) 
- prince & pauper
- huck finn

what else?

we'll skip the shell silverstein. that sidewalk has ended.

i was given a copy of james and the giant peach, but i...i want to say i was too old for it, but i actually probably wasn't. i felt too old for it. frankly, i thought it was a stupid thing to waste one's time with, and didn't bother with it very far. i remember reading through about half of it one night when held physically hostage by my grandmother due to a babysitting task due to not having anything else to do, and i just found myself ridiculing roald dahl at the age of, like, 9. i never found myself immersed in fantasy novels - never went for the tolkien or the lucas or really any of that stuff. as soon as you started bringing in, like, elves and shit, i lost interest.

the purpose of this post is to build a list, and we will probably leave a lot of this behind. i'm going to start with asimov, check prices, and move from there.

i've otherwise got the media i have organized, which is not a lot - a couple of king books, some arthur c. clarke and a few records from u2, rem, bryan adams, peter gabriel, gowan, genesis and the barenaked ladies.

i left a lot of books at my mom's place when i moved out, and sold a bunch more before i went to bc. as i've now sorted through everything, the only thing left is to hope i can get something from the carleton archives, or a fortunecity mirror or something. i know there was a list, i just don't have it.

if i'm going to rebuild the books, i'll need to go through the king, pick up a bunch of science fiction (a fair amount of asimov, a bunch of clarke, some bradbury), some tom clancy, some dean koontz, some mark twain and, yes, some ayn rand. my dead uncle is responsible for that. they told me they found him in the bathroom of a hostel in victoria, dead of an apparent aneurysm; i assumed it was drug related, but that was never confirmed, and i never asked. he was in his early 40s. selfishness as a virtue can bite you in the end, huh?

i'm sure i'll remember some more...

music wise, i'll need to get some michael jackson. what's the status on buying a michael jackson record in 2019? is it alright if it's just going to his...well, it's not even actually his kid, is it? i dunno. see, i got into mj through weird al, though. and, i lost interest after dangerous, for obvious reasons. but, my ten-year old self was really much more interested in black or white than nirvana. we grow quickly at that age, though.

i also had a bit of a bon jovi phase, which i'll defend on the basis that they weren't as bad as their peers. if the criticism is that bon jovi were hair metal, it's actually a bit off the mark - they weren't this pompous, ridiculous, materialistic, nihilistic marketing behemoth, but rather a kind of working class band from new jersey, with a contemporary sound. they were at least as punk rock as springsteen, anyways. and, they actually had a kind of synth pop center, too, which is where i really came from - tears for fears, gabriel, genesis.

i guess that's the missing part of it, stuff my dad or uncle dubbed me. i had a cassette with a day at the races on one side and a night at the opera on the other. i had beatles tapes, genesis tapes, and an out of place dub of animals that it took me years to get into, because it wasn't what i was looking for. i was very young - 8 or 9 - when somebody at chez decided to toss on one of these days for a lark, at like 2:00 am, while i was in the car on the way back from a road trip with my step-father. i was pretty instantly intrigued. the announcer mentioned it was floyd, but didn't elaborate - it was presumably not necessary. tony, to his immense discredit, couldn't identify the track, either. there was a copy of delicate sound of thunder around, but it was missing the second side. so, i asked around for years trying to figure out what the song was. the dead uncle decided i was describing the vocal effects in sheep and dubbed me a copy of animals, which i just found a little too meandering at that age - it hit me like a grateful dead record, just not enough movement for a young mind. my dad never had a copy of meddle, either. it wasn't for years that i found it in a torrent...

"aha! there's that crazy bass part!"

anyways. i have my work for the next little while set aside. it's time to start doing it.

the first post is going to be in the "dear diary, so much has happened..." format. and, we'll go from there. i might be back into the stand by the end of the night.....

you know, i'm racking my brain for actual books that i read in grades 7 and 8 - and even 9 - and i'm not able to come up with anything. i remember being given photographed handouts and asked questions around an ability to prove very basic comprehension, or being asked to read short texts and then produce an opinion piece around it. but, i don't think anybody ever handed out books to us and told us to read them.

i went to both elementary school and high school under the rae/peterson curriculum (harris won when i was in high school, and didn't succeed in changing the curriculum until the year after i'd left), and i'm learning just now that it was kind of an experiment. i did not receive any actual marks until grade 10; my high school transcript, which i still have, simply states "completed" for grade 9. i have records of standardized testing where i scored in the 95th-99th percentile, but i don't have grades for these years.

what i remember about the report cards is that they had a long list of criteria, and you'd be evaluated on a points system, with 1 the highest and i think 6 the lowest. this was just the teacher's arbitrary, completely subjective opinion. i remember getting lots of 1s in english and math, 2s or 3s in phys ed and some pretty low marks in the "shows respect for authority" and "works well with others" categories. even my university profs would have scrawled "does not work well with others" on my report cards if given the chance, and i'm not particularly embarrassed about it - i don't work well with others, and i don't want to, either.

i'm not even sure i can pick out much of anything of shape in these years really at all. we were split into classes that taught core subjects, and then shipped into different rooms for specific topics. so, i remember having a science teacher, a french teacher, a geography teacher, a music teacher, a phys ed teacher, a home ec teacher, a history teacher and then a kind of general "grade 7 teacher" that was tasked with everything else, which i guess is math, religion and english. but, that really meant that the curriculum was focused on the peripheral subjects due to the more rigid scheduling, and that math & english were largely unstructured babysitting periods with a lot of pointless busy work. when we went to geography class, or phys ed, we were there for a short period with a defined curriculum; when we went back to the general class room, the teacher could organize it any way they wanted to, or not at all, which was often the actual reality.

so, the system put more of a priority on learning french or geography than it did on learning math or english. we did regular spelling bees in grade 8 english class. and, i don't really remember taking math in grade 7 at all. grade 9 was more structured, in the sense that there were separate math and english classes, but i still didn't get graded, and i still don't remember reading any actual books. i explicitly remember reading shakespeare, but we read it orally in the classroom. and, there's a text called the chrysalids that i can't otherwise place that i might drop into grade 9.

of course, there's some possibility that i don't remember any reading projects because i was so efficient with them. there's a few texts from later in high school that i remember putting off until the last minute and then reading through in an afternoon. there's certainly some possibility that i just devoured it so violently that it never really got digested. but, the thing is that i liked reading, so i don't know why that would have been true.

i think the truth is that i was mostly baby sat all the way to the end of grade 9, and consequently don't have a lot to report on.

if i remember something, i'll insert it, but i think the way we're going to do this is that i'll be doing independent reading over these years, instead.

so, here's the new link:

https://thejournalofj.blogspot.com/

which is also on the side...

and, we'll say that dad got a scanner for christmas.

so, i've finally reached a pivot point, and there's going to be a slight change of plans.

i have now copied every file that i can find - from laptops, external drives, usb keys, cds, dvds, etc - on to the new external drive, and organized everything by year. it's very rough, and there's a lot of overlap, but it is all in roughly the correct place. so, the next thing ought to be to restart on the rebuild, and quickly run through 2013-2016, with the intent to get back to where i was.

....except that i'm deciding that the process is incomplete, in the greater context, and want to rewind back to 1993. 1993!? yes - 1993. and, why 1993?

i started in mid-1996 for a couple of reasons. it was early 2016 when i decided to switch directions, my first demos were from the summer of 1996 and my earliest memories of internet access were from mid-1996. a lot of things added up with that. but, at the same time, i was picking up a story halfway, one that had undefined bounds. now that the bounds are better defined - the current story begins in mid-2013 when i moved to windsor, meaning the alter-reality ends in mid-2013, with an intended completion date of mid-2033 -  it makes sense to pull the alter-reality back to 1993, to allow for some symmetry in the process.

that would mean the alter-reality will run from the summer of 1993 to the summer of 2013, in the end.

there's some other reasons for this. the earliest files i have are dated to 1995, but i have pictures going back to the 80s, and i wanted to find some way to work some of these things in to the story. starting in 1993 lets me do that. i also wanted to do reviews of records and books from 1993-1996, which was actually the most formative years of my life - starting over again in mid 1993 means i'm starting in the summer between grade 6 and 7, which is of course right before i went to junior high school. if we're going to do a portrait of this artist, that's a better place to start.

but, if i didn't get online until 1996, at the earliest, how am i going to have a journal from 1993?

what i'm going to do is split it off into a separate blog that will run strictly from 1993-1996. i will be sorting through some papers over the christmas break of 1996 and find an old journal and decide it would be neat to put it online. so, the mechanism is that i'll be typing in a journal that i had already written up by hand. when it's done, it will exist in a standalone file.

what that means is that i'm going to be thrusting myself back into the alter-reality almost immediately; i just need to spend another day or two organizing all of these files, first, before i get to posting to the new journal, dated to july 15, 1993. i'll push forward with this as i push forward with the rebuild, until it connects back together in early 1996.

i'm going to try and be as honest as i can as i run through this. i have the benefit of a lot of hindsight, and i'm not going to pretend i can be a 12 year-old again, but people go through a lot at that age, and i'm going to try and get down as much as i can. some of these things will no doubt surprise you. it's been so long, that i may even end up surprising myself.

i am obviously a different person today than i was then, as we all are.

but, in a lot of surface ways, not much has changed - i spent most of the summer between grades six and seven awake at odd hours, in my room reading, specifically through the stephen king catalogue, iirc. i had no friends at all over this period, as i prepared to go to a new school that none of them were going to go to. i'll have to start off with a broad statement around that. i was living with my mother during this period, which is something i haven't talked much about. i played some guitar, but was not really into alternative rock music yet - i listened to a lot of what was called "college rock" during those years, as well as a lot of pop music. there was no computer around, but i had a big tv in my room that was either tuned to muchmusic or to conan. we'll have to go through the process of moving from mom to dad in mid '94. so, that was life and how to live it, and where we're starting over again with this...

i wouldn't be doing this if i didn't think it was going to be worthwhile.

so, i've now got all of those boxes properly organized and put away. there's one stack of cds and one box of books left out for easy access, which is very specifically books and cds from the period up to mid-1997, which is the next period i'll be working on in the alter-reality.

the last run through the main pc (i keep calling it that, but it is now merely the 32-bit box) is now done, as well. this included a final browse through the directory structure for loose files, as well as an attempt to undelete any files sitting on the drive.

and, in the process, i found something i thought i had lost - a file called archive.pst, dated to late 2011. it was hiding in the virtual machine, and had to be brought back using a file recovery utility. this might be my missing email. or, it might be corrupted beyond readability. i'll find out over the next few days.

i found a few other large psts as well, with dcxx file names, indicating they're likely unreadable. we'll find out...

that means i'm back to the email process this week.

there's two things left to do before i can get back to sitting on the laptop and organizing files for the rebuild. i want to run the same file recovery process on my old quantum fireball, in the hopes that i can find some old thunderbird boxes. i suspect they're there; the question is if they're readable. i'm also still running an undelete process on two relatively old hard drives that don't have vista/7 drivers and can only be read from inside xp, but that i can't get my 32-bit box to read, either (because i broke the plug and play on purpose). so, this is running on the 90s laptop - and is slow. it's getting there.

a day or two, tops. i think. 

i also took the opportunity to do some organizing and general cleaning. i can't remember how i described this basement apartment; i know there are neither pictures nor video up yet, which is quite conscious. but, it's organized in such a way that there are two bedroom-like enclaves (with sliding doors that are kept always open), but no dining room or eat-in kitchen (there is of course a kitchen, with the luxury of laundry in it, and a bathroom). the way i have it set up is that i'm using one of these enclaves as a bedroom and the other as a dining/living room, then using the main area as a studio. something you'll note is that the only thing i actually do in the "living" room is eat - i spend almost all of my time in my bedroom or in the studio. i guess this is a function of the fact that i neither watch tv nor have any friends. my "living room" is really the studio. i think i was over this a few times last year - the actual functions of the spaces i need are to sleep/type/read, to record and to eat. so, i need three rooms, organized in some capacity. the last basement had four rooms, with the fourth being a big eat-in kitchen, but i didn't actually use it for anything other than to store garbage; i ate in the living room. the smoky apartment had two rooms, and i consequently found it a little cramped, as i had to force everything into one space. three is a better number, here - even if the total floor space is technically somewhat smaller (it's a negligible difference).

for the last several months, i've just had everything piled into the other room, waiting for it to be cleaned - loose plastic recyclables, receipts, user manuals, books, cds, bills, documents, old school work, etc. i've finally got all of this cleaned up and organized, which has converted the area into an actual liveable space. the studio is still messy, but it is at least in order - although i need to caution that it could be a while before i get back into there. even keeping in mind that i will need to catch up in the alter-reality before i get back to working on the discography, the material from 2003-2004 is actually entirely completed (a rarity in my discography), meaning the next projects to reconstruct actually date to late 2004 and early 2005. the next major project i'm going to be actually working on is a matlab project, and is going to be about programming, rather than recording - i'm going to be writing an entire record using mathematics and physical modelling. i've got about 15 minutes to start with and a handful of loose ideas to base sounds around. expect this to be exceedingly abstract. i may even use it as an excuse to finally get into reaktor or whatever passes for it nowadays; the point is that i'm not going to be getting back to actual note-based music composition until i delve well more than a year back into the discography.

i'm still hesitant about planning around this basement, but my best option may be to wait for a spot in a subsidized building. the air quality comes up and down, but seems to be workable so long as the fan is on. i've done a few extra caulking layers and think i've reached the endpoint of what i can do with that. i still just can't figure out if there's a teenager upstairs smoking, or the air in the neighbourhood is just bad, all around...and, if i can figure out the answer to this, i'll be able to plan the future a little better.

i think i can get a few shelves, regardless - one for cds and one for books. the plan will be to fill these shelves as i work through the alter-reality. i don't need to commit to this basement long-term to spend $40-50 on some relevant general utility shelving. but, i'll need to wait until the spring before i start thinking about hauling shelves around; that's fine, it'll be a few weeks, at least, before i get there. i'm not building custom shelves like i wanted to in the other space, and am glad i didn't.

i think the primary concern once i get these files aligned is actually going to be fixing the broken laptop, one way or the other. i bought parts for it, only to have the processor finally fry. if i can't find a way to bring it back, i'm hoping i can find a cheap replacement and swap out the parts. this is an hp pavillion that was manufactured in the 2010-2012 period. you'd think i could find a replacement that can take similar parts for less than $200, and that's fine - i still have cash my grandmother gave me for that explicit purpose. the price has just come down since then. i'll be using such a laptop - with 8 gb of ram - as a video editing machine, kept offline, and connected to one of  the other machines via a local network. i'll have to transfer the files to the internet gateway via some kind of flash device.

so, that's my update for the last few days - i'm kind of turning a corner on some things, and getting closer to getting back to the rebuild. so long as things unfold as planned, this will be worth it in the long run.

now, regarding these court cases...

still no response from the cops. this was day 108 of the 120-day statutory period. they're running out of time. so, i sent them a note.

i'm still waiting for the privacy commissioner, but will give them until the end of the month.

the file destruction request, on the other hand, is something i'm getting impatient about - i should have heard a response by now and will need to get on the phone shortly.

i'm waiting for the report from the cops before i decide on what to do regarding the court audio. you have to understand that i could sue this woman and win, then never see the cash, so i'm better off suing the cops under a charter breach. but, the thing is that there's no time frame on a charter case, and about a year-long time frame regarding a human rights case. so, i can wait for the cops to drag the charter case out, but i can't wait for them to drag the human rights case out.

if it starts to look like the cops are just stalling - and it's getting close to that point - then i'm going to have to move forward on the human rights case. but, if i get a good report, i might skip it.

the point is that i'm waiting for the report before i make my next move, whatever it is.

if you're finding that the slow progress through what is now a considerable back log of work is frustrating, perhaps you should have thought about that before you decided to waste so much of my time.

i have been crystal fucking clear that what i need to be productive in my art is a stable, drug-free environment. i do all of my work in a completely sober state. i always have. the introduction of any kind of drugs, alcohol or nicotine into my workplace environment is going to have the effect of severely retarding my productivity levels.

as it is, i have a very large backlog and it is going to take a long time to work through it.

i will not be skipping over it.

i will not be moving on.

i was hoping to get through september by the end of the weekend, but i lost most of saturday to a systematic link update over the review site and i've spent most of the last 12 hours sleeping. i hadn't really slept since thursday afternoon, so i guess i was catching up.

i'm beginning to conclude that the remaining smoky smell in here is a combination of dry air and dust. i might change my mind, still. i mean, it's certainly making me cough and irritating my throat and nose, but, since i finished the laundry last week, the only thing i've been able to really tie it to is the heaters. the heat gradient (it's below freezing.) right now should be defining negative pressure, so i shouldn't really be getting pollution from outside, although it does seem to be a continuing annoyance.

i'm going to hope that the dust comes down as the place is put in order. it will probably never go away entirely, but hopefully it gets a lot better. and, i'm just going to have to get used to drinking a lot of water to offset the extreme aridity.

is there still some chance that somebody is smoking upstairs? i can't rule it out. but, if that's a part of the problem, it doesn't seem to be the totality of it. i'm more concerned about the pollution in the neighbourhood, right now, even if somebody is up there smoking. i'm going to have to find a way to seal the windows up.

the immediate solution is to drink more water - a lot more water.

i'm going to get through a bit more this morning, stopping before i get to the major vlog from the night that i may have been roofied, and woke up in some stranger's car. but, i need to put it aside for the day, at least - and i might not get back to it until thursday.

so, i finished the bureaucracy through august - that is done now - and i need to ask...should i just go to september?

well, i wanted to make some calls and get to cleaning in the other room - but it assumed i would have been done with this by monday or tuesday, and i'd be able to get back to september for the weekend. i can't make those calls, at this point. i'd might as well just push through september...

if i can get september done by monday morning, i can switch gears for the start of the week.

and, i did finish august, 2016 early this morning - i just kind of spun out right after.

i'll get to the bureaucracy after i eat.

then, it's back to the real world for a few days. and, as we can see, i'm getting anxious.

so, that gets me through season 9, which is most of the way through august, 2016. i need to have a big meal before i finish the rest of the month, and then get to real world stuff for tomorrow morning. i think the lights were seriously the last thing to build for the bathroom; the next step is to set up the dining/living room, which will also act as a side library. that should take me through the rest of the week, meaning i should be able to get started on season 10 by the weekend, hopefully.

i just need to keep working and get through it as quickly as i can.

so, i was distracted by the court thing - and that's going to be a constant for a bit.

& i had to sort of reconnect with myself over facebook, to remember how i was doing this.

...but, 07/2016 is now completely reconstructed.

july was very busy, which is what i intended at the time. august & september were messy, but i did get back to work in october, and both november and december were quite productive. so, the rebuild for the next two months is going to shift back to the politics side, which actually might mean it could come through a little quicker. we'll see.

it's at the end of december that i'll do the final close on inri000 - yeah. inri000. - and i'll have to figure out how to do it. i will need to date it to the current date, whenever it is in 2018 (hopefully not 2019). but, i'll have to figure out what i want to include over the last two years. i suppose i should leave a skeleton on the personal drama, meaning i could theoretically get through it quickly. i have no alter-reality posts at all for inri001, so i'll have to decide whether i want to layer them in as i go or leave them for last.

remember: the politics blog is going to flip over in november, so the remaining component to layer in will be the vlog posts. what that means is that i could just put the vlogs aside. and, i wouldn't be losing anything with it, because i now have the time stamps. hrmmn. yeah. that's maybe a good plan...

i'm going to eat, and then get ready to head out to do some shopping. i'll be spending the rest of the morning cleaning, with the aim of getting into the shower before i get into a clean set of sheets. i will then have a pile of clean clothes to sort through when i wake up. some of it needs minor sewing attention, some of it maybe doesn't fit as well as i'd like, and might not again in the future. i made the error of doing a lot of my new wardrobe shopping before fat redistribution.

speaking of which, i'm long overdue for some "new" clothes, too. that's maybe something to do this winter, as well.

i'll be back at august within 48 hours, i hope. i want these prints destroyed asap, but it makes the most sense to wait for a response, as the superior court process could take years.

& 07/2016 is now reconstructed, after a couple of days of work.

i need to fill in some gaps, still, but i should be on to august in a few hours.

so, the updates are at the politics site - i will be filling them in as i catch up. but, the short update is that i was able to move on october 2nd, and am now able to get back to work for a few days.

it's been a messy month, but i think things are beginning to stabilize.

unfortunately, i have multiple lawsuits to deal with and that will slow me down for a while. but, i'm no longer going to be in need of constantly searching for housing all day, every day.

Request For Further Disclosure

Hello.

I am requesting further disclosure on the case of Regina v. Parent, J. Case ID: 79487. 

This letter is being prepared for delivery to the Crown Attorney’s Office in Chatham, via the Windsor Office. It will also be presented to the Justice of the Peace and the Crown’s Representative in court room 6 on the morning of October 24th, with intent to schedule a follow-up court appearance on October 31st. I am willing to schedule a resolution meeting and subsequent pre-trial as soon as I am satisfied with the disclosure on the topic, but not before then, so long as the court allows for the reasonable delay.

With that said, I think that it is reasonable to review the situation, up to this point, to understand the nature of my requests for further disclosure. Something went very wrong here, and I want to get to the bottom of it.

I was arrested, without being shown a warrant, on the evening of September 24th (the details of which are best left for the trial process, but center around a “threat” i made to take the complainant, an upper class landowner, to the human rights commission for discrimination in housing, i think with cause - a threat the complainant decided was harassment) and held for approximately 20 hours before being released on a recognizance of $100 and an order not to communicate with the complainant, or be near any kind of weapons. I was fingerprinted. The crown initially had a lengthy list of demands on my release, included $4000 bail, but the justice rejected each of them as without evidentiary basis. An extremely oppressive impact statement - where I was accused of being “illegitimate” and “unwelcome here” - was bizarrely read into the record by the crown, ironic (and relevant) given the circumstances of being accused of harassment for “threatening” a discrimination suit. I was then formally charged with harassment and ordered to appear before the court in two weeks, under the assumption that the crown was moving forward by indictment, as I had been fingerprinted and arrested and held for nearly 24 hours.

I appeared before the court on October 10th and explained that I had not yet received disclosure, despite making a formal request on October 1st (and an informal request on Sept 27th). It was decided that we should give the crown another week for disclosure, and I should come back again for October 17th.

On October 11th, I was told that there was a conflict of interest on the case, and the file would be moved to the Chatham office. I was not given any information regarding the nature of this conflict of interest, and still do not know why the file was moved. I am requesting this information as a part of the full disclosure. At my last appearance on October 17th, it was decided that the crown should be given another week, due to the circumstances around the conflict of interest.

On October 22nd, I received this disclosure and learned the following things:

1) I was indeed arrested without a warrant, before I was fingerprinted and held for 20 hours.
2) The charge summary states that I was held for those 20 hours for SHOW CAUSE - that is, I was literally held without cause. I suppose that somebody decided they could figure that out later, and then never did.
3) The crown will be proceeding summarily, on a conditional discharge around the recognizance conditions. No jail time. No indictment.

So, I was arrested without a warrant for “threatening” to file a discrimination suit, fingerprinted and held without cause for 20 hours before the justice finally dismissed the crown’s position as having no evidentiary basis. Then, after the crown declared a conflict of interest on the file, and you will note that the complainant is a powerful and wealthy landowner, it eventually elected to proceed summarily - after it had already held me for 20 hours and fingerprinted me. It almost seems as though I was being sent a message not to file. So, who is being harassed here? 

I will be following through with a charter challenge around s. 9, for arbitrary detention as a consequence of police harassment, to begin with, and am requesting detailed disclosure for that reason. 

Please provide the following:

1) A detailed explanation of why the case was moved from the Windsor to Chatham offices, on a conflict of interest. 
2) All audio/video and photographic material of the accused (myself) in custody, including the audio/video & transcript of the bail hearing. There is a conflict of interest on this file.
3) All fingerprint and mugshot reports, to prove they occurred, as they should not have occurred. 
4) A detailed history of any previous complaints that Caroline Chevalier or Ryan Myon have filed with the Windsor Police. There is a conflict of interest on this file.
5)  Any reports surrounding the mental health of the complainant, as her statements suggest she may be suffering from a schizo-affective disorder and/or paranoid delusions. I will be requesting a full psychological evaluation of the complainant.
6) Transcripts and audio of any and all communication between the complainant and police from July 1st, 2018 to the present. There is an acknowledged conflict of interest on the file.
7) The original statement from the complainant that was read at the bail hearing. This appears to have been modified in the disclosure package. There is a conflict of interest on the file, and it is relevant to better understand the complainant’s true motives in filing charges.
8) The discipline record of the officers, particularly officer montino. There is a conflict of interest on the file.
9) Any record of charges filed against the complainant, including charges of filing false reports or charges of criminal harassment.
10) Transcripts, email records and audio of any and all communication between the original prosecutor and the officer, and between the original prosecutor and the complainant, and between the original prosecutor and administrative and management staff in the attorney general’s office, and any other known recorded communication with anybody that works at 200 Chatham Street East regarding this case, or regarding the complainant. There is a conflict of interest on this file.
11) A complete record of all “emails” in full, not snippets taken out of context or enumerations of how many “emails” were sent on a specific date. This is not just relevant, it is the central aspect of the case. How can we determine if there is an objective ground to deduce that the communication caused the individual to feel threatened if it is not available to be examined in full? You’ve given me a mustard sandwich. Please arrange the “emails” in  absolute chronological order, and number them for the purposes of further reference, as detailed reference to them will be made in the course of the trial. There is no reason not to disclose the “emails” in full, and if you will not or cannot do so then you should end this absurdity and drop the case. This is the most vital evidence that there is, here.

I am also requesting that you remove the redaction on the following components of the initial disclosure:

1)  the confidential witness list. i claim this is relevant for the charter challenge, as we have an admitted conflict of interest and a potential bias in the officer’s conduct. this “confidential witness” may be the cause of the conflict, in which case it would be necessary to uncover the witness to carry through with the charter challenge. so, please provide an argument otherwise, or disclose on request.
2)  the mcneil list. i filed an opird report against officer montino on sept 14th, so this is more than relevant but necessary for the charter challenge. i suspect that this was redacted to protect the officer from potential charges and is withholding vital evidence. please provide an argument otherwise, or disclose upon request.
3) the cpic query on my name. why was this redacted? this is my own record. it may be useful for the charter challenge. and, i would like to see it simply because it was redacted - and frankly think that’s a good enough reason, too. so, please provide a reason you’ve redacted, or disclose.

I also have important documents to disclose to the crown and we can talk about that at the resolution meeting.

if i can figure out why a conflict of interest was declared, it should help me move forward on the s. 9.

so, i'm going to talk to duty counsel in the morning, and may decide to retain counsel, in the end.

i've decided that a charter challenge under section 9 - arbitrary detention - is the correct way for me to go after the cops, on this. i just need to figure out what the mechanism of doing so is.

Detention undertaken for improper motives may be held to be arbitrary. Anything in the circumstances of the detention or arrest which would make it suspect on any other ground, such as an arrest made because a police officer was biased towards a person of a different race or nationality, or where there was a personal enmity between a police officer directed towards the person arrested, if established, might have the effect of rendering invalid an otherwise lawful arrest (R. v. Storrey, [1990] 1 S.C.R. 241 at 251-252). “Individual liberty interests are fundamental to the Canadian constitutional order. Consequently, any intrusion upon them must not be taken lightly and, as a result, police officers do not have carte blanche to detain. The power to detain cannot be exercised on the basis of a hunch, nor can it become a de facto arrest” (Mann, supra at paragraph 35). 

the justification made by the officer is that i was "unpredictable", which is essentially a hunch - and a poor reflection of the facts, as my behaviour was incredibly predictable: i replied to the same ad (when it was reposted) the same way every day. absolutely predictable. and, i do believe i can demonstrate a bias & enmity, as well.

i believe that i need to launch the charter challenge at the pre-trial.

http://www.justice.gc.ca/eng/csj-sjc/rfc-dlc/ccrf-ccdl/check/art9.html

you know, this is a hybrid offence.

they could have moved forward with an indictment.

i want a preliminary inquiry, so i'm going to ask for one. we'll see if they give me one or not.

"listen, here, nigger. if you call me a racist to my face one more time, i'm going to charge you with being uppity, and send you back to the assembly line where you belong. you got it, nigger?".

and, now that i've seen the disclosure, i think it's a better idea to wait to file the human rights complaint, because i can use the acquittal or dismissal in the claim.

it doesn't matter how much money or influence she has, she's only half at fault. but, it certainly demonstrates the point.

"how dare that nigger call me a racist? i'm going to lock her up for vagrancy. the nerve."

and, what i should do is state on the record what happened.

- i was arrested on sept 24th at 21:00. 
- the crown argued that i should be held indefinitely, without bail.
- i was fingerprinted on sept 25th at around 12:00. i dunno; i was in jail. 
- the justice rejected their claims and let me out with $100 recognizance, and an order to not touch guns or contact the complainant. i was released around 17:00.

this would suggest the crown was proceeding by indictment. right? fingerprints. no bail. 

- i requested disclosure informally on sept 27th, and formally on oct 1st. 
- i came in on oct 10th for my first appearance, to inform the court that i had not received disclosure.
- on oct 11th, i was told there was a conflict of interest on the file and it would be moved to the chathham office.
- on oct 17th, i appeared before the court to inform them that i had not received disclosure yet.
- on oct 22nd, i was told the crown would be proceeding summarily.

so, my fingerprints should be immediately destroyed, then. right?

i was in custody, i could hardly refuse.

if i get the right justice, she could even throw the case out right then and there.

still awake.

i really thought i had the right to elect to proceed via indictment if i wanted, but it seems like the difference comes down to appeal. and to an extent the indictment is just skipping to the higher court.

it seems like i get a pre-trial, which should give me the resolution meeting that i suspect will lead to dropped charges. that's good.

but, i'm not going to get a preliminary hearing. or, maybe, the trial is itself the preliminary hearing - and the appeal becomes the actual trial.

if i was proceeding by indictment as i thought, i would get the opportunity to put the case before a provincial court to determine if the evidence should go to trial in the superior court. there would be a hearing in provincial court, but no trial. if the provincial court decided there was enough evidence for a trial, it would just go right to superior court. but, because i'm proceeding summarily, i get a trial at the provincial court, instead. if i feel there's an error in law at the provincial court, i can then appeal to the superior court.

so, i think the difference is a little less than i initially thought, it's just a question of where the trial begins at. i was thinking that a preliminary hearing was an extra step that you introduce before you go to trial. but, it seems more like it's skipping a step, really, by eliminating the trial at the provincial court.

there's a part during the trial where i can move to dismiss the charges due to a lack of evidence - meaning i can treat the trial like a preliminary hearing, to an extent.

so, i'm still going in to set a meeting with the crown on wednesday, although i'm also going to ask for some more documents - all of the emails, and the complainant's impact statement. i will have documents to give the crown at the resolution meeting, including the opird report, the transcript of the bail hearing & my own written statements in this space.

one of the issues at trial is going to be a debate over what happened the week previously.

and, there is no mention of the 4 am phone call, at all - which i have the recording of.

kijiji only keeps responses for a month or so, so the direct responses are all deleted.

so, i can't provide those responses.

that might seem backwards, but the point is that i'm only sending my phone number. and, the ad was reposted daily, so the response schedule was in fact reasonable.

what i'm concerned about is that "x responses were sent on this day" leaves too much to the imagination. this goes back to the error in law made by the officer - the idea that harassment is the same thing as annoyance. if i'm being charged with annoying a rich woman, i'll plead guilty. but, harassment is something more precise than that. so, i actually want the full response entered into the evidence list, to demonstrate that there was nothing threatening in it.

afaik, all of the missing responses are one line of text - my voip box #. and, that is a reasonable response to an ad.

i'm otherwise willing to stand up for my responses and essentially provide a commentary for them in court.

and, right now i am sleepy. the truth is that i've had a long day.

kijiji only keeps responses for a month or so, so the direct responses are all deleted.

so, the ad response record is incomplete and misleading - not quite enough to claim the information is false, if close, but enough to request actual copies of the responses. you can't say something like "x emails were sent on this day". that's not admissible evidence. you have to actually present the actual responses.  

i'm also apparently missing the impact statement that was read to me at the bail hearing, and which was what i really wanted.

so, i guess that the next step is to request further disclosure.

but, i wanted disclosure to review the information, to check for inaccuracies and misleading statements, and to gather information for the complaint. and, while i think i can represent myself well. what i need to understand is the process.

i understand that they should not have fingerprinted me, but they did. now, getting those prints destroyed is my actual primary concern. a lawyer would know how to react to that. it's one thing to read the rules and point out an error, it's another to know how to hold people accountable for it.

i suspect, to begin with, that i should have a strong argument to get those prints destroyed. who do i make that argument to? the justice?

a commonality throughout the documents is not that i've committed a crime, but broadly suspecting that i might commit one, maybe.

....meaning i was arrested on suspicion that i might commit a crime, rather than on a claim i actually committed one.

and, that's not how things work in a country like canada.

i'm going to be seeking a payout from the cops on this. horrifically egregious...

ok, we've got the responses in the file, and i can see what she's trying to claim.

there are some technically false statements in the report, and they may have played a role in how things unfolded, but, overall, it seems like a schizophrenic fantasy built on an exaggeration, rather than a completely false attribution.

it seemed completely invented at first, but an unreasonable misinterpretation of the responses could have led to the statements, as filed.

there's also some files in here from 2014/2015 that are...

well, i thought it was my mom that sent the cops here on a suicide call. she denied it, though. i haven't really spoken to her much since. there's a confirmation, though. hrmmn. mom lied to me. sucks. but, what do you do when you confirm a five year old lie that you saw right through in the first place?

i can't get into the details of it, but these reports - by an organization called COAST - are so far removed from reality as to be comical. the way i'd describe it is if you could imagine a child having a detailed discussion with einstein about relativity, and then trying to write a summary of that discussion. on top of that, the agents working for COAST appear to have made things up entirely out of nowhere.

i have never requested medication from anybody, with the exception of the hormones. in fact, i am broadly opposed to the idea of medication in mental health - and have written widely about it over the course of many years. any suggestions that i was ever suicidal as a reaction to an inability to gain access to any medications are completely invented out of whole cloth. in fact, it is exceedingly unlikely that i would fill any medication that was given to me, as i would not want it to affect my individuality or my ability to create art. again: i've written about this extensively over a long time period. my contemplation of suicide during this period of time was a purely rational reaction to my disinterest in labour, and my preference for death over labour.

i do not know why a support worker would write a false report of this nature.

i would like these documents to be destroyed, frankly - not because they say anything about me specifically, but because they have absolute inventions and poor interpretations in them. i mean, what do you do when you get your file and realize the people writing into it are literally making shit up? honestly?

the notes from that period are actually up here, so i'd advise anybody interested in the question to consult my own perception of this rather than that of the COAST workers.

this is legitimately a completely false report.

i have to be careful about what i'm publishing here because i can't share the information in the report, but there's three possibilities:

1) she misattributed some of the responses. that is, she assigned responses that were not mine to me. if this woman suffers from a psychological condition - as i believe it is clear that she does - then this may have been an error brought on by psychosis.
2) or, it might be done on purpose.
3) or, she just made it up.

if 2 or 3, the purpose would be to prevent the human rights complaint. 

i haven't made it through the document yet, but, right now, it seems like the thing i'm going to be requesting on wednesday is the responses to the ads themselves - which are being referenced, but might not actually be in the document.

and, is it time to legally change my name to jessica, just to be safe on the border check?

hey.

if you want to bring a social activist in on false charges, you should expect a lengthy process out of it.

wait.

ok.

so, i was arrested on an indictable offence - and fingerprinted - but then charged with a summary conviction, in the end.

hrmmn.

like, they tried to hold me on bail, and then they charged me with a summary offence? if you're going to hold me on bail, indict me, you fuckers.

i'm going to look into this further tonight, but i think it's time to call a lawyer. that might be the best way to get what i want. it seems like they fucked up enough that the charges should probably be withdrawn or dropped, immediately. but, i want to do this in a way that makes sure that the file is destroyed - as it should have never been created - and the cop and the woman are both held legally accountable.

again: i'm not looking for an easy way out. i'm looking for justice.

i got my disclosure; it's on a dvd, and we'll see what it says.

but, the information sheet made a few things clear.

they're not seeking jail time, which undermines the entire premise of the charges. i'm supposedly a threat to the public. if that is true, why aren't they seeking jail time?

and, they want to proceed summarily.

so, they want this to be done quickly - they want me to plead guilty to a minor offence, take it on the chin and be on with it. why spends months fighting a minor offence?

i'm not going to do that. i'm going to request an indictment. i'm going to fight the charges with everything i can. there's going to be a witness evaluation. a pre-trial. i'm going to subpoena the cop. i'm going to make a huge deal out of this, and drag it on for months or years.

why?

because the logic is backwards - i don't gain anything by getting this done with quickly. i lose border access, and possibly run into problems with my income. but, if i drag it out, i gain the possibility of compensation, increase the chances of the officer facing discipline, get to the point of charging the woman with filing a false report and get to my end point - which is not even acquittal, but file destruction.

i had a tremendous injustice done to me by a thug that should be in jail and a woman that belongs in an institution. i'm not going to forget about it. i'm going to fight until every single person responsible for this gets what they deserve.

and, they will get what they deserve.

trust me.

first, i'm going to review these files. but, i should be ready to file the human rights complaint in the morning.

no.

listen.

i'm perfectly happy - and in fact somewhat eager - to be the punk in the court room. we've swung far too far to the right recently, and this patriarchal faux feminism masquerading as progressivism is a prime example of how we've taken massive steps backwards over the last several years.

my defense is going to be to appeal to liberal rights theory and libertarian values, in opposition to this fake feminism, which is just a front for authoritarian capitalism.

but, it's not just that my defense requires this - the society requires this.

i've been as clear as i can that i'm on the other side of this argument, and i'm both eager and able to make these arguments in a court of law.

yeah?

well, fuck you and the tipper gore you rode in on.

so, i'm back to stable access and could potentially get back to work over the next few days. i still don't have those shelves i've been putting off getting for years, but everything else seems to have fallen in line over the last few days, so now i just need for the court to disclose so i can take this psychotic, decrepit, senile old dyke to the human rights commission and teach her a fucking lesson in public law. seven figures. i'll let the crown pull me along as long as they'd like, but this is ultimately not in the public interest or a worthwhile use of public tax money or public resources at the court house, and i consequently have enough faith in the court system that somebody along the way is eventually going to say "this is retarded" and pull the plug on it.

the woman at the counter said tonight or tomorrow. i'll need to take a run down this afternoon to see. and, it's going to be interesting to see what they give me.

there's an off chance that they might try to arrest me for filing the complaint, as it's "indirect contact" but if they try that then it will just expose the fraud underlying the charges. you could imagine that bail hearing, right.

"you arrested her for filing a human rights complaint?"
"well, it was a breach of the recognizance."
"and, why was she arrested in the first place?"
"for pointing out that she was being discriminated against, and threatening to file a human rights complaint."
"you charged her with harassment for 'threatening' to file a human rights complaint?"

i mean, i kind of have to do it, to make sense of my defense - which is that when a thug shows up at your door, in a blue uniform or not, and threatens to put you in jail for exercising your rights, you are obligated to exercise those rights. and, if that thug arrests you for standing up for yourself, that thug will need to face the consequences of his criminality, in the end.

one thing at a time.

i need disclosure, first. and, if they give me something redacted or something half-assed, i'll go back to the court and demand they do better. i'm not willing to move to the next step until i'm happy with disclosure, unless the justice enforces it. and, if she does, the pre-trial is going to be a messy affair.

as previously, my wholesale reseller isp is completely incompetent. they insisted on a remote install in a unit with no lines in it, and of course it failed. i have to wait until monday for a cogeco tech. it's cheap when it's working...

i think the kid upstairs is smoking inside and that she might think she can blame it on me. she might be skipping school, too. the reality is that i quit smoking almost three years ago and never smoked inside, anyways. so, she's in for a rude surprise when i point the truth out to her dad. and, daddy's going to have to believe me, too. i'm not yet at the point of bringing it up. but, the situation is incomparably better, and i'm broadly happy with the move.

i want to note here that my netbook was turned off at some point yesterday, when i was in court. that's when i was gone, between 10:00 and 2:00, roughly. i last used the device on the afternoon of the 16th, was home on the evening of the 16th and was home on the evening of the 17th. i discovered it on the afternoon of the 18th. i reset the device as a precaution. but, i'm more concerned about the potentiality of police harassment - it seems like somebody took a look around when they knew i was gone.

i lost tabs, but i can get them back. i'm more upset about the unjustifiable surveillance.

i was hoping the charges would be dropped by now, but i need to check for disclosure again pretty much now. i don't need time to set a resolution date: i know what i'm expecting, which is a lot of contrived bullshit. but, the crown may need time to make sense of the absurdity before it.

if the crown is smart, it will conclude that it will cause less damage to itself if it drops the charges than it will if it discloses. and, while i'm likely to look for a foia request regardless, i should get what i need for the discrimination lawsuit out of the bail hearing.

i reiterate: i was arrested on false charges to prevent me from filing a discrimination suit by a cop that was already out to get me. and, the documentation produced by the process should help me go after them both, if it's released.

so, this is the choice the crown is making: does it want to risk the consequences of disclosure on an extremely weak case that it will probably lose at the preliminary stage, or is it better off backing away from the situation altogether, to prevent the consequences of disclosing the corruption?

personally, i'm in this for the long run and looking to make people suffer for what they've done.

i do not yet have internet. tuesday. maybe.

i'm typing from a brand new chrome book, an ibm thinkpad. this will make blogging remotely a lot more possible, for me. it's a big update. i just got fed up with being non-mobile, and had no interest in learning how to type on a phone....

the move itself went flawlessly, although i'm still waiting on the washing machine. tuesday. maybe.

i had my hearing on wednesday, and found out on thursday that the prosecutor has been removed/resigned due to a conflict of interest. i don't know the details, but i suspect a relationship with the cop. so, they're bringing in a prosecutor from out of town. but, i expect the charges to be immediately dropped. i have to reappear on wednesday, and i'm going to request a stay due to delay on disclosure, if the charges aren't already dropped.

i'm going to wait to type further.

so, i've started moving some small things over, already.

i need to spend the night packing what's left. i may have to take a few more short runs.

it seems like there's been a second overdose in the alley at the 7/11 in the vlogs. it's for the best that i get out of this neighbourhood.

i have a truck coming tomorrow morning. 

i should hopefully get the keys and the notice of abandonment to my landlord tomorrow afternoon. 

i can't tell you where i'm moving for at least the next ten days.

the hydro switches on wednesday.

if everything works out, i'll have a teksavvy technician available on thursday morning, although i'll need to call on wednesday night to make sure. and, i'll type up some long updates, at that time.

i expect full disclosure by the end of the week.

i'm vlogging. and it'll come up relatively soon, actually. i should finally get back to work in the next week or two.

i wouldn't expect much in the way of updates until then.

we'll talk soon.

i need to move.

so, what actually happened? what's the story, here?

around 20:00 on monday evening, i sat down to make some spaghetti. as i was about to slice into my tomato, some cops banged on my door.

as mentioned, my primary concern was avoiding resisting arrest, so i was very compliant. whether i've committed a crime or not, resisting arrest is always one, so you don't want to do that.  

i was arrested for "criminal harassment", and brought to the station in cuffs in a windowless van. i called a lawyer when i got there, for the purposes of informing somebody i was in jail, but i did not expect to be in custody for more than a few minutes. i am, after all, being charged with repeatedly applying for an ad.

i was instead placed in a holding cell for over twenty hours. i spent most of that time screaming for access to a judge, who i knew damned well would snicker at the situation, yelling the situation into the cameras (for the record) and counting to....i made it 10,500 before my throat forced me to stop. i suspect i could have counted to 20,000 if i had metallic vocal chords.

i decided i would charge $1000 emotional damages for every second left to rot in a cell for the crime of replying to an ad. so, when i get around to it, the suit against the city will be for $11 000 000. that should be enough to find somewhere to live that is smoke-free, right?

i did not sleep. i urinated once, close to 16:00 the next day. i ate one of the three meals they gave me.

i was brought out to see several people during the day, including duty counsel and a representative for legal aid. as mentioned, duty counsel was a conservative older lady that i trust was acting in what she perceived were my best interests, but she seemed quite concerned that i was going to become irrational in the court, and feared i would harm my own well being. i fully recognize that she spends most of her days helping people with low levels of education get out of terrible situations, and there's obviously a lot of altruism in that, but it sets up a mentality of fiduciary duty; she wanted me to go sit in the corner and be quiet and let her deal with it. which i did actually do, because, on some level, she was absolutely right. i just worry that i wasn't present for a set of important conversations. it's one thing to tell me to be quiet in the room and let me listen, and another to tell me to sit in the other room.

it seemed like the outcome of the hearing had already been decided when they finally brought me into the court room at the very end of the day. the justice was clearly baffled by both the situation and the charges, stating into the record that it was unacceptable to arrest somebody with no prior record and leave them in a cell for twenty hours. i was not permitted to speak and was in fact asked to sit down repeatedly, but i think i might have helped her understand, if i was permitted to do so. duty counsel was a nervous wreck, clearly frightened i was going to undo her careful work...

but, i stayed quietly. i didn't sing o canada through air guitar. i didn't call the judge a fascist. i didn't curse the accused, or swear at the prosecutor or do anything of the things that....that she probably actually deals with on a daily basis. it was perhaps incorrect to see me the same way as most of the people she represents, but i can't fault her for it. that's what she knows. that's what she sees.

the judge only seemed willing to reject the crown's argument up to the point of triviality. i suspect that she would have dismissed the charges if she could, but, given that she couldn't, she had to leave the conditions in place. so long as the charges exist, i must be ordered not to reply to the ad. and, while she did not feel that she could remove the recognizance altogether, she reduced it from $2000 to $100 - a functional dismissal.

she repeatedly stated that there is no evidence to justify the conditions.

when the crown read the charges into the record, she talked about how the owner of the apartment felt unable to show the apartment to other "legitimate" applicants because she feared i might be using false identities to reply to the ad (which is simply schizophrenic nonsense, imagined whole cloth, and without the slightest evidentiary basis), and told me i was "not welcome here". i reacted by scoffing at the absurdity of the presented scenario, and the oppression inherent in the language - and the justice seemed to agree with me.

so, i can't go near guns. like i'd go near guns, right. that's a standard condition, and i had no argument, because i don't care. and, i can't reply to the ad until the charges are dropped or defeated. if i do either of those two things, i will be arrested a second time, and have to pay $100.

i need to reappear on october 10th, if the charges are not dropped before then.

to me, continuing to reply to this ad is a rights issue. i hardly expect to be approved. but, i have the right to be annoying - independently of whatever schizophrenic fantasies anybody wants to have, or pretend to have. however, i have been charged with a crime and agreed to not engage in this behaviour, until such a point comes that a judge upholds my right to be annoying. you could articulate this different ways: i am providing for due process, or allowing for judicial review. but, it's one thing to tell a cop that he's wrong and close the door and another thing to get charged by that cop and go to court and need to have a judge state that the cop is wrong. i will expect compensation, in the long run.

i was released a little after 17:00.

yeah. ok. careful language in the code.

"release from custody by officer in charge" - that was the warrant/non-warrant binary, which comes with the $500 max.

but, i was ordered released by the judge. so, i don't have a max, because the cops didn't actually agree to releasing me at all.

the cops didn't want to release me at all.

for the crime of replying to an ad. 

lol. fucking idiots.

but, listen: the justice thought this was retarded, entered into the record that she was upset at the amount of time i spent in custody and ordered me released on the most lenient conditions that she could. i expect any judge to agree entirely with the justice: this is vexatious. i fully acknowledge that these details are something i'm just learning about now, but i understand the legality of the situation fairly well and it's a flatly stupid case. in the end, the more ridiculous the crown is about it, the harder the judge is going to come down on it.

i snickered when the charges were read, and the duty counsel cringed, but the justice smiled - she agreed.

this is stupid.

is the difference that a regular release is agreed upon by the cops, and a judicial release is ordered by the judge?

'cause, if that's the case, it was clear to me that the judge thought this was a pretty stupid thing to charge somebody with.

ok.

on third thought, i'm in a different section, a "judicial interim release". see, lawyers aren't logicians. so, they don't recognize a binary between "arrest with warrant" and "arrest without a warrant". i would think that these are the only two possibilities, but apparently a third one exists.

there are no maximum recognizance conditions set on a judicial interim release, and that is apparently true whether there was a warrant involved, or not.

but, see, this is the kind of thing that i didn't have explained to me. what is the difference between this situation and a regular release on recognizance? in both situations, the accused is being released before a trial, right? so, why is there a separate section for this?

well, if he arrested me without a warrant on a hybrid offence (that is unlikely to result in jail time), it's just another strike against a guy that shouldn't have the job that he has.

frankly, i'd be surprised if a judge issued a warrant.

i guess we'll find out.

actually, the maximum amount is $500, regardless.

period.

there is no situation where they can lawfully ask for more than $500 recognizance.

yet, they did.

when the crown attorney breaks the law in court, right?

"in progressive canada, the (in)justice system commits crimes against YOU."

so, that's something else i need to figure out - was i arrested with or without a warrant?

and, see, here's the thing.

maybe i could have stopped all this bullshit before it started if i knew this stuff off of the top of my head. but, what fun is that? see, then the cop gets to keep his job, and i don't get to sue for damages for harassment and negligence.

there will be a proper investigation, in the end. and, the fuckers will be held accountable for their errors.

the thing going through my head at the time was "i don't want to resist arrest, i'll figure this out afterwards". so, i was compliant for that reason. because you hear about that all of the time - cops show up to arrest you for swearing in church, and then instead of the cop getting fired, you end up in jail for assaulting a police officer.

you know, i'm wondering something else.

i didn't ask for a warrant. maybe i should have.

these are the rules for releasing somebody arrested via warrant.

"(b) release the person on the person’s entering into a recognizance before the officer in charge without sureties in the amount not exceeding five hundred dollars that the officer in charge directs, but without deposit of money or other valuable security"

they tried to charge me $2000, but the justice said that was crazy because there was no evidence (take note.) and cut it down to $100. so, in the end, what happened was lawful.

but, did the crown make an unlawful request, or was i arrested without a warrant?

because, if i was charged with a hybrid offence without a warrant, i should not have been arrested at all - i should have been asked to appear in court.

the more incompetence i can uncover,  the bigger the payout.

the duty counsel got me out of jail without any meaningful conditions. that was what she said she wanted to do, and that's what she did, and on a certain level she's right - that's the most immediate concern.

but, if it was done at the expense of me understanding the accusations against me, or putting me at a disadvantage in relation to the trial, then it was a pyrrhic victory.

i need to confront her about what documentation she has to pass on to me, tomorrow.

the crown did read something into the record.

it could be that that was all there was to it, but i know i wasn't getting the whole picture. what do you do, in that scenario? you can hardly escape the cage and barge in. you just have to figure out what happened and hold people responsible for it accountable for it.

they obviously can't conduct a bail hearing without me, and then tell me that evidence is admitted later. that's all on the record. they'll all get fired.

but, none of this can happen, it's all impossible.

so, we'll see what the transcript says, right?

i was not asked to testify.

i was not asked to present evidence.

i was told this would occur later, both by the counsel provided and by the justice.

again: i accepted duty counsel because i was unclear of the proper procedure and unable to research it. when told that the evidence would be presented later, i knew it seemed wrong, but i deferred, due to being unable to verify it. and, i am confident that the charges would have been dropped outright if i had been given the chance to present anything at all resembling a case.

hrmmn.

if i got fucked around at the bail hearing, that's just another reason to sue the city.

let's see what the transcripts say...

i have neither heard nor seen, in writing, any allegations made against me.

see, this is not what happened.

and, i asked about it, repeatedly.

i was told by both duty counsel and by the justice that no analysis of the evidence would occur until a pre-trial.

i was brought into the court at 16:45 and asked if i agreed to the conditions or not. i did not see a witness. i did not see an officer. i did not get a chance to present evidence. i pointed out that this seems wrong, and was told otherwise.

i have not met my accuser.

the more layers of corruption there are, the more layers that will fall, in the end.

let's see what the transcript says...

http://lawfacts.ca/node/146

ok.

i'm going to wait and talk to a lawyer about the holding cell video, as there's no obvious way to do it. i'll probably need to make a request to a judge.

i have a stress disorder. putting me in a cell on trumped up charges is pretty egregious. i don't think it'll be hard to get a judge to release the footage. but, it's going to take an argument of some sort. that's ok.

right now, i need to focus on getting full disclosure.

...and, on determining whether a part of the bail hearing happened without me, or not. i suspect that i missed some of it...it just didn't seem like the whole thing, to me...

i was arrested for replying to an advertisement on the internet, and held in a cell for twenty hours.

i'm sure he thought it was very funny.

but, it was also very illegal.

hey, listen.

this cop made a huge mistake for the benefit of his ego. it's like having sex with a camel: you might enjoy it for a few seconds, but then you have to live with the consequences.

and, he's going to pay the price for that mistake.

yeah, so, with the bail hearing, i should order a transcript, and i've sent out an email about it to a transcriptionist.

it should cost roughly $20, but we'll see an estimate for it.

now, how do i ask for video footage of myself in detention? that could be harder.

because i'm not licensed, i need a judge to order the audio from the bail hearing.

that's whacked. i understand the restriction as it applies to media or the general public, for privacy reasons. i don't really want a newspaper combing through my bail hearing without a court order declaring it's public knowledge; i get it. but, it's my fucking bail hearing. is my self-interest not obvious?

worse, i have to sign a waiver that says i can't use the audio for any meaningful purpose.

i guess the transcription lobby has some power, huh?

it would be a lot of effort to get a recording, and i couldn't do anything with it. let's see if the rules around transcripts are equally draconian.

ok.

no, i knew this already...you have to hire a transcription service to get transcripts...and that's expensive...

i wonder if i can just order the audio for $20 or something.

so, what do i need to do for tomorrow?

1) file the appeal with the fee exemption. remember: i'm poor. i don't pay court fees. there's plenty of justice for the impoverished; it's the working poor & middle class that get reamed.
2) request full disclosure from the crown.
3) ask for the transcripts of the bail hearing, including the sections i missed.
4) ask the duty council if she has any documents i'm entitled to see. i should have done that the other day. i was not exactly thinking straight. she should also have some information for me regarding a legal aid certificate. was there a warrant for my arrest?
5) ask for video of my time in detention, as i was clearly in anguish. tortured. dying inside. so sad. so sad...

i think i will need to wait until the process plays out before i can prosecute the officer, or file the complaint. right now, i want data. i just have to figure out how to get all of these things.

i think it's freedom of information. and i think it's a $5 fee.

i've never seen a bar exam, i don't know how i'd do on one.

is it oral or written?

i'm going to get something to eat first, but this looks like what i'm up to.

https://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/Canadian_Criminal_Procedure_and_Practice/Disclosure

my voice is a little better, now.

i've graduated from beginner trumpet player to sounding like stephen hawking.

maybe i'll do some physics tonight? naw.

so, i'm going to write the crown a letter requesting immediate disclosure and leave it at the court house tomorrow morning. i just need to figure out the proper protocol...

and, i can be persistent about that, too.

what are they going to do?

charge me with harassment?

i know, i'm such a badass, aren't i.

sexy, isn't it?

lol.

ok.

i took three years of a "law and society" course, which included courses on tort law, constitutional law, aboriginal law and criminal law as well, but i have never studied the procedures involved in an actual trial. and, they tell you this, right. "this course will not prepare you for a court room". this is why lawyers go through an apprenticeship process, right.

so, i need to teach myself how this is going to actually happen.

one of the reasons that duty counsel was so necessary for me yesterday is that i didn't have access to a computer, meaning i was unable to research the topic. i've never studied bail conditions. i don't have any idea. if you gave me the night to figure it out, mind you...

i assumed i was going to go to a pre-trial hearing first, and a bail hearing second. that is, i assumed the judge would base their bail decisions on a pre-trial. well, how is a judge supposed to figure out proper bail conditions without looking at the trial evidence? apparently, what they actually do is look at prior history. i guess you could argue that i'm missing the point: the bail hearing is not intended to weigh the value of the evidence, but whether i'm eligible for bail, which is not determined by evidence but by history. but, that still strikes me as irrational. i do believe that had the judge looked at the actual evidence, i would have been released without conditions - and the case would have been dropped.

if i am right, and the judge dismisses the case immediately, i am going to be forced to deal with the consequences of a charge pending on my record while i am searching for housing, in a very critical period, in the first few days of a stay. it's difficult to underestimate the potential damage that this is going to create for me. and, while it may work out in my favour in the end, it's an outrageous scenario in the short-term.

imagine a scenario where, on sept 30th, i am permitted to sign a lease on the condition of passing a police check, fail that check, and then have the charges dropped on oct 1st. that's a lawsuit the cops can't win, sure. but, it's a deep cost for me, as well.

so, the purpose of the date on the 10th is supposed to be to ask for disclosure. but, i really feel that the crown should have had that information available before they even arrested me, and that it should have formed the basis of the bail hearing.

i frankly do not think it is unlikely that the court will drop the charges before the 10th, making the hearing and disclosure unnecessary - although i will ask for disclosure, anyways.

but, the longer this drags on, the more annoying it is for everybody, as the harder it is going to be for me to leave.

at this point, i don't even know if the crown is seeking to send me to jail or not. while i would consider that extremely unlikely, it's kind of important information for both me and a potential landlord to have, as i am about to sign a lease.

i suspect that the actual truth is that the situation was driven by the officer, who essentially filed a false report. but, this is what we'll need to determine over the upcoming weeks. either:

1) this woman legitimately thinks that somebody aggressively applying for an ad puts her in some kind of risk category, which indicates she's dealing with some kind of schizophrenia, or some kind of stress disorder. she appears to be imagining that i'm following her around. i've never met her. but, if her fear is truly honest, it implies she requires psychiatric attention. or,

2) the cop manufactured the situation to go after me, in whatever collusion there was with this woman.

so, it's either a crazy woman that needs help or it's a malicious cop that needs to be fired - or both.

we'll figure this out, soon enough.

i really had no option but to sleep.

i'm up now....

the most annoying thing about what happened yesterday is that i lost the day to applications, and i'm going to lose the day today, as well, because i lost my voice. i spent much of the night and day screaming to see a judge.

i sound like a kid learning how to play the trumpet: sound for a second or two, and then wind. if i yell, it comes back a little. i probably just need to rest them. hopefully, i'll be able to talk again tomorrow.

20 hours. i was very close to being released; the magic number is 24. 

i'm going to roll with the system so long as i have to, but i don't think things are happening the way that they're supposed to. i have yet to see the charges laid against me, or any evidence or arguments from the crown. i told them i was representing myself, but they put the situation in the hands of a duty counsel instead. she had a conservative approach that was focused on getting me out of jail, and she did - my conditions are that i can't apply to the ad again (until the charges are dropped) and that i can't be around guns, which isn't much of a condition at all. if somebody sees me with a gun, i'll have to pay a $100 fine. but, i would have taken a much more aggressive approach in insisting there are no grounds for any restrictions at all.

in my view, the situation essentially reduces to due process. the woman is making an accusation against me, and i need to defend against it. this accusation may be frivolous and vexatious, but i will need to suffer the consequences of it until that is demonstrated - and then be compensated for any damages i suffer as a consequence of it.

as this ad is posted every day, i'm of the opinion that i have every right to apply to this ad every time it is posted. i will continue to exercise my rights in due course. but, because i'm guilty until proven innocent, and i signed an agreement, i will need to back off for a few days or weeks.

i will be aggressively attacking this woman in the court. some cursory google research suggests that she has a history of filing vexatious charges, and usually has her cases dropped. i am absolutely willing to be the person that stands up and puts a stop to this, has her ordered to undergo a psychiatric evaluation and has her barred from further vexatious litigation. she should expect this to be very difficult. and, am i supposed to shed a tear?

i will be aggressively attacking the officer, as well, with the intent to have him fired.

i will be suing the city for emotional damages related to locking me up on false charges.

i will probably launch a civil case against this woman for damages resulting from having to fight off a harassment charge while i am trying to move. 

and, i will be launching a human rights challenge against the apartment complex, as well. i was going to have a hard time doing that, up until this point, because i didn't have a lot of information. but, the information being presented by the court is full of language like "the tenant is not welcome". that is, her vexatious litigation is going to give me the information i need to prosecute her for discrimination, that i didn't previously have.

in ontario, applications may be denied for financial reasons like failing a credit check. but, telling a tenant that they are "not welcome here" is discrimination under the law. it's amazing that this ended up in the court documents, but i'll take my good luck, as it is.

obviously, my first order of business is getting the charges dropped, and i legitimately do not expect this to be difficult. i'm really fairly stuck until i can do this. i'm almost wondering if i'm better off waiting, so i don't scare off any potential landlords.

and, while i don't even expect the case to go to trial, there is an obscure possibility that i could be facing up to ten years' imprisonment. it's almost impossible for me to think about moving until the tenth...

yeah.

i'll need to file in the morning.

i'm going to accept legal aid, because it is available and it would be foolish not to. i don't want to pay for a lawyer, but i'll take a lawyer, for free. see, i think i understand the law well, and i'm good at winning arguments, but i'm going to need help with the procedural aspect of it. i really think what i need is a tutor, to help me through the procedure the first time. and, once armed with that experience, i can then represent myself in future cases. i'm expecting to hear something back by the end of the day, and, if i don't, i'll call after 17:00.

the one qualification i need to present is the following: given the context, i need the lawyer to be female. and, you can expect me to show up to court looking pretty, too.

the last 30 hours have been absurd.

full write-ups will happen over the evening. but, i now have to fight an absurdly frivolous harassment charge over the next few weeks, which is going to make it difficult to find an apartment. i think i'm actually dealing with a dumb cop. but, i'm now going to fail a criminal check, until i can get the charges dropped..

i have no choice but to appeal and will probably file it immediately in the morning.

in the long run, i expect to end up richer from this. a lot richer. in the short term, it's massively disruptive.

this is a letter meant for potential counsel.

http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/thoughts/kafkavsorwellinreallife.html